As Moms, We Shape Our Kids' Inner Voices

BlogHer Spotlight

How many times have you said something along the lines of, "How could I be so stupid?" When your children are in ear shot? How many times have you exclaimed, "OMG! WORST DRIVER EVER! MORON!" With your kids in the car? A post that Sara recently wrote at Moments of Exhilaration points out a Peggy O'Mara quote: "Be careful how you speak to your children, one day it will become their inner voice." As moms, we are shaping our kids' inner voices. Right now. With every word we say. It kind of makes you rethink what you said ten minutes ago, doesn't it?

Sara makes some very important points about how we speak:

ScreamBut it’s not just how you talk to your children directly, or only about themselves. It’s also how your children hear you talk about other people and about yourself. All of those things become their inner voice.

If Adeline hears me criticizing other people all the time, she will learn to think that way. She’ll assume that I’m thinking that way about her, even if I don’t say it, and she’ll internalize that voice. More importantly, if she hears me criticizing myself all the time, she’ll learn that it’s an appropriate way to treat oneself. And that is a lesson I absolutely do not want to teach her.

Photo Credit: iragelb.

Read more from Her Inner Voice at Moments of Exhilaration


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