Sometimes I Forget Everything My Body Can Do
Editor's Note: In this post at A Parenting Production, Erin talks about her body image issues and how these impact every aspect of her life regardless of her awareness that her body is a wonderful aspect of herself that has enabled her to achieve many wondrous things. Is it hard for you to shut out voices of self-doubt, too? What does this mean for our daughters? -- AVF
Every time I look in the mirror, I get distracted by the lump of fat that is under my belly button. It's always been there in some form, since I was fifteen years old. It taunts me, sticks out its tongue and bullies me on a regular basis.
Photo by Rachel Carter. (Flickr)
Occasionally my mind forgets and I look in the mirror and smile... and my reflection smiles back. But more often than not, the voices linger, popping up in the shadows of my happy moments, bursting the bubble of some of the bright spots in my life. It's not right. I want my body to be reminded of all the wonderful things it has done and will continue to do in my lifetime.
But it's hard. It's so. damn. hard. Some of this is within my control. I could exercise more. I could pass on the ice cream. But it's so much more than that. These voices live and breathe in my mind. I feel they would be there no matter what the scale says, how my clothes fit or how much fat I could pinch with my fingers.