So You Think I'm Fat
By ginagold on January 02, 2012
http://www.bitterandresentfulmom.com/ Moms sharing useful tips and bitter resentments.
I know I've been telling a story about my facebook crush lately but I need to talk about something else tonight. I need to talk about my body image issues. My husband is not one to pour on the flattery, he's not negative but he's not positive either. When he speaks he straight and to the point.
When I got pregnant I was 128 pounds. I gained 40 pounds and lost 30 so my weight is 138 and I'm 5'3". I want to get back down to 128 but I can't seem to get there and it frustrates me. When I say this in my women's group my African American friends say I'm crazy and that I look fine and my White friends are just quiet.
The other day my husband looked me up and down and said "you look good." This is what I heard in my head.
I look good for a short fat person.
I look good compared to how shitty I looked before when I was even fatter.
I look good for a woman my age.
I look good in spite of my wrinkles and stretch marks.
I look good as long as my husband isn't looking at other women who are more attractive than I am.
I'm not proud of this, I just figured that if Gina was sharing her inner thoughts I would share mine.