Stand-Up Comedian Jay Mohr Graciously Answers My Questions About Parenthood, Reality TV and of Course, Poop.
By Yvonne on April 12, 2010
BlogHer Original Post
One summer night in the back alley of an Improv, I met my Celebrity Crush, my "Free Pass" if you will.
I have loved Jay since he was a guest host on Live with Regis and Kelly. Until his appearance there, I only knew him as "that actor from Jerry Maguire." I had no idea that he was a (brilliant) stand-up comedian. I went to a few of his live shows after learning that he was a comic and you guys, he is HILARIOUS. I've never been disappointed at one of his shows.
Since that first night when we met, we've become friends.
When I found out he was writing a new book about parenthood, I was thrilled. The stories he tells on stage about being a father are some of the funniest I've ever heard told. I imagine the book will be just as hilarious. I asked Jay if I could ask him a few questions to post on my blog, so that The Wonderful People Who Read My Blog could get a chance to know him a little better. Because he is incredibly kind and because he "likes me a lot," he said yes.
Confession: I needed help with the questions. Because even though I know him and we are friendly, he will always be My Celebrity Crush and well, I got all doubty-pants about my questions. "He'll think this is a stupid question!" and "this isn't funny enough!"
Thankfully, Metalia stepped in to help.
Which job has required more of your improv talents: stand-up or parenting?
Jay: I think stand-up requires more improv skills. Parenting to me is establishing STRUCTURE. If our kids wander from that structure we can tell them they are wrong. Audiences boo and tell you to fuck off. Kids don't boo until they're teenagers.
What has been the best surprise of becoming a father, and what's been the worst?
Jay: The best surprise of becoming a father is being able to use the women's restroom with a baby. There is a couch in there! Holy smokes. No wonder women go to the bathroom in pairs; there's a place for the extra person to lay down! If there were couches in the men's bathroom at sports bars, there would be as many guys in the bathroom as guys at the bar. Also, it seems that women clean up after themselves even when no one is looking. Fascinating. The worst surprise of becoming a father is learning that kids are ALL morning people.
Poop: Totally desensitized to it at this point? Or still totally gross? Discuss.
Jay: Poop has never bothered me for whatever reason. It might stem from the fact that it has been shooting out of me three times a day for forty years.
Do you remember how we first met? If so, can you tell my readers a little bit about that night. If not, I can, IN GREAT DETAIL.
Jay: I do not remember the first time we met. I do remember the times you somehow became my wingman for the mentally insane. Your readers need to know the great lengths you went to to keep me from being murdered in San Jose by a woman who took the bus from Texas to come see me. HELTER SKELTER. (me: Maybe I need to tell that story sometime. Fun times!)
I am convinced that kids have a My Parents Are Doing It sense. It only took getting busted once to teach us to ALWAYS LOCK THE DOOR. Have you ever been "caught in the act"?
Jay: I have never been caught in the act. YET. I am prepared to tell my son, though, that daddy was on fire and Momma was just putting it out with her bottom.
Team Jill or Team Bethenny?
Jay: TEAM JILL. Bethanny is an ugly person inside. When drama always surrounds one person, eventually you have to realize that the one common denominator is THAT PERSON.
What is the ONE thing you want people to know about your new book?
Jay: ***READ THIS BOOK-FLATTEN YOUR STOMACH!****
I can't thank Jay enough for taking the time to answer my questions. He really is a great guy.
You can read more from Yvonne at Joy Unexpected.