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A new study including 151 mothers in Brisbane, Australia has found that first-time moms want more information about what life with a newborn will be like and says they often don't feel prepared for the recovery period after giving birth and emotional toll of caring for a new baby.
A new study published in The Journal of Perinatal Education finds first-time mothers want more information about how a newborn will impact their lives. Thirty-five percent did not feel prepared for the physical experience following birth and 20% did not feel prepared for the emotional experience.
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"This study demonstrates that new mothers are eager for high-quality, accurate information of what to expect of life with a newborn," says the study's lead author, Margaret Barnes, RN, MA, PhD.
While I think there's a definite benefit to educating expecting moms information on what life with a newborn may be like, (after all, knowledge is power), until every child comes with his/her own user's manual, I think ultimately there's only so much you can prepare for. Every woman's birth experience is different, every child is different, and every new mother's experience with her child is different. Each child has a unique temperament and will have different needs. Some will want to nurse every few hours, some will want to nurse much more frequently (or never let go of the boob). Every child's sleep patterns will be different as well.
If you try to explain to a woman ahead of time how much a newborn will affect her life, is it realistic to think your words will have that much of an impact? Could it really help her prepare for what lies ahead? Is recovering from birth and caring for a newborn something anyone can really prepare for ahead of time (without having access to a full-time nanny, personal chef, housekeeper, etc.)? I feel like this is one of those things that a woman has to experience for herself to truly "get it."
Before I had my first child I knew that once she entered the world nothing would be the same, that I would be sleep-deprived and have a baby nursing around the clock, but I couldn't fully grasp the extent of how different my life would be, how beyond tired I would be, how sore I would be from an (unnecessary and unwanted) episiotomy, nor just how much love I could have for one tiny person until it actually happened to me.
However, I do think that it's important to equip first-time moms especially with information and resources that will help and support them in their first few weeks and months of life with a new baby. Instead of sending moms home from the hospital with a diaper bags full of a few diapers and a can of formula, perhaps hospitals should instead give women lists of names, numbers, websites and email addresses of people, places and organizations they can turn to if they need help. Organizations like La Leche League International - with dates and times of local meetings, phone numbers to certified lactation consultants, warning signs of postpartum depression and who to call if you or someone close to you suspects you have PPD, links to groups such as Attachment Parenting International, house cleaning services, numbers of postpartum doulas, local moms support groups like MOMS Club, MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers), etc. That is real information that new moms can use.
What do you think? Do you feel you were adequately prepared for life with a newborn? If not, do you think classes or a book could have helped? Do you have other suggestions?
Additional resources:
- KellyMom: Nursing your newborn — what to expect in the early weeks
- KellyMom: Newborn Babies and Sleep
- Mom Advice: Finding Moms Groups
- BabyCenter: Hospitals continue to undermine breastfeeding with free formula
- Postpartum Progress
- Natural Birth May Build Bond Between Mother & Baby
- Tips from a Modern Day Mother and Housewife: Dealing with Postpartum Depression
- 10 Secrets for a Great Birth
- 10 Steps Towards Mother-Friendly Birth
- The Birth Survey
- First Time Mom: Pamper Yourself: 10 Things to do Before Baby Comes
Contributing editor Amy Gates blogs about green living, attachment parenting, activism and photography at Crunchy Domestic Goddess.
