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Many years ago, I was a journalist--you know, the kind they had before the Internet came around. I wrote for newspapers and magazines in California...
 
 
 
 

Survey: 88% of Working Parents Suffer Stress-related Health Problems

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Working parents have a lot to juggle, and this can create stress. But what we often overlook is that stress has real health consequences.

Several weeks ago, I put together a survey* asking working parents about stress and its effects on their health. More than 600 people responded. I filtered out respondents who lived in a household with at least one stay-at-home adult, which left 560 respondents in households where all adults work. Their answers were alarming:

  • 80% catch up on work nights and weekends
  • 81% worry they will burn out
  • 88% said they suffer from at least one stress-related health problem since becoming a working parent
  • 59% have problems with anxiety
  • 43% struggle with depression

Can you say “public health crisis”?

Moreover, what these numbers don’t show, but what any stressed out parent will tell you, is that once the health effects of stress are felt, everything gets that much harder to manage. That’s when some of us start circling the drain.

Interestingly, most parents (82%) said their employers offered at least one family-friendly perk, such as flexible scheduling. But it seems clear that this is not enough to keep stress at bay for most.

When asked to choose one thing that would make their lives easier as a working parent, there was no one-size-fits-all answer. About a quarter selected “More help with chores/kids” and another quarter answered “Good part time option.” Detailed responses are here.

But before you dive into the details, here’s what I think we all need to understand:

Most jobs are made for people who have no caregiving responsibilities.

That means that most parents (or people caring for elderly or sick loved ones) do most of the accommodating. The results of this survey imply that for many of us, the price we pay is our health.

Hundreds of parents left comments at the end of the survey. One summarized the problem this way:

“Unfortunately, we’re living in a “half-changed world” – women have many more professional opportunities than did the last generation, but our importance as mothers and wives and to ourselves has not been taken into account, and there are increasing demands from our jobs…We all need to redefine work/success/”doing it all” so that our daughters will not face these same dilemmas.”

Detailed results, pretty charts, and a few disclaimers about this survey on working parents and stress can be found here.

What about you? Do you think you've suffered health problems from the stress of being a working parent?

Katrina Alcorn is a former-journalist-turned-blogger who writes the blog Working Moms Break.

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paulag01 5 pts

What really stands out for me Jen, is that if you don't take care of you, without YOU, the rest is irrelevant. So while it is the first thing to tank or get pushed... paradoxically, it is SO important.

Hope you are feeling better and know that you matter, so listen to your body :)

Paula Gregorowicz, The Intuitive Intelligence™ Coach
Download the Free Report: Your Own Uniqueness: The Path to Purpose, Prosperity, and Playfulness at http://www.intuitiveintelligencecoaching ( http://www.intuitiveintelligencecoaching.com )

paulag01 5 pts

Amen to that! If I could have 1/2 of the hours I spent in my 20's wasted in useless meetings, I would be ecstatic.

Paula Gregorowicz, The Intuitive Intelligence™ Coach
Download the Free Report: Your Own Uniqueness: The Path to Purpose, Prosperity, and Playfulness at http://www.intuitiveintelligencecoaching ( http://www.intuitiveintelligencecoaching.com )

paulag01 5 pts

Thanks for chiming in Rita. I think this is the best sentence I have read all week:

"but when dinner is burning and work is on fire and my daughter is asking if the computer is more important than her, I can literally feel the heart attack coming o"

That about sums it up, I think!

Best
-Paula

Paula Gregorowicz, The Intuitive Intelligence™ Coach
Download the Free Report: Your Own Uniqueness: The Path to Purpose, Prosperity, and Playfulness at http://www.intuitiveintelligencecoaching ( http://www.intuitiveintelligencecoaching.com )

The Amazing Trips 5 pts

Most of the working parents that I know discuss ad nauseam how they feel like they're under a ton of stress, but this is the first time I've ever seen it quantified. The statistics you cite are very discouraging. But, I believe they are 100% accurate and that makes me so sad.

As a working parent, I know that there is only so much I can do. My challenge is that - when it comes to my children - I want to do it all.

I want to volunteer and lead Girl Scouts and attend school performances and help them with their homework and get them on the bus in the morning and know all their friends. As their mother, I feel like I'm PROGRAMMED to do those things and if I don't do those things, I'm failing them in some way. Or, I'm failing myself because I'm not the "Good Mom" that I've always imagined I would be.

On the flip side, I'm also responsible for keeping a roof over our heads and in order to do that, I'm out of the house in an office 40+ hours a week.

(I never imagined that either...)

Most nights, I don't get to bed until 2 AM because of a plethora of both work and home activities that require my attention. The emotional drain is huge because I know I won't get this time back with our children and that translates to a huge physical drain because I genuinely try to do it ALL. Except, of course, take care of myself: my exercise regime has completely tanked.

At the moment, I'm on week three recovering from what had been a severe case of pneumonia and adrenal failure that required a multi-day hospitalization. My immune system just STOPPED working. So now I know what can happen when you try to do it all and I know that in order to prevent something like that from happening again, I need to make some significant changes in my life.

I'm not sure when or how those changes will come to be, it might require me leaving my current employer (gasp, stability!) but my health is far too important to continually sacrifice.

Jen & The Amazing
Trips

www.TheAmazingTrips.com ( http://www.TheAmazingTrips.com )

jbcarney 5 pts

Just today I was told that we need to have a 2-hour phone meeting at 6:00pm because it wasn't fair to the other time zones (Atlantic and China) to have it at any other time. I have repeatedly said that I can't work from 5:30 to 7:30 because I have sole parenting responsibilities for my two children ages 4 and 9. So again I'm forced into a position where I will have to do a half-assed job at parenting while working unpaid overtime. I want to quit, but that would mean no health insurance for my whole family. So yeah, I feel trapped.

Katrina Alcorn 5 pts

Yes, 6 hour work days would make a huge difference. Or limiting work to 3 days a week. Bottom line: 40+ hours doesn't leave much time for all the other stuff you named.

I would even dare to wonder if a 6 hour work day would really hurt our GNP so much. I have sat in ridiculous meetings for hours and hours where the clock was ticking, time was wasting, basically because everyone was too stressed out to think straight, and not making good decisions together. My friend Joan Blades calls this "working stupid."

Perhaps, if we had saner schedules and saner lives, our productivity would even go up..?

Rita Arens 7 pts

I think you nailed it -- most of my job stress is related to needing to do it and take care of my daughter/tend to the house/cook the dinner/pack the lunches/pay the bills/mow the lawn/do the laundry all at the same time. Without servants, all that stuff just gets pushed and contracted, which creates anxiety and stress. I don't know too many people with servants. I know a lot of people who are really stressed out.

Today's work doesn't have a quitting time -- it's just there, and you know what you need to get done that day, and you find a way to do it, but when dinner is burning and work is on fire and my daughter is asking if the computer is more important than her, I can literally feel the heart attack coming on. I constantly make course corrections in my quest for balance, but to a certain extent, I think it's impossible unless I could outsource household chores and errands and focus only on raising my daughter when I'm not working.

What would make it better? Six-hour workdays. That would allow daylight hours to attend to caregiving and household responsibilities and errands that need to be done at stores or doctor's offices or vets that close at 5 -- while still earning money. But what would that do to the GNP?

Rita Arens authors Surrender Dorothy ( http://bit.ly/Qp0sS ) and is the editor of Sleep is for the Weak ( http://tinyurl.com/9pg62e ). She is BlogHer's assignment and syndication editor.