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Back in 2005, at the very first BlogHer conference I was asked to introduce BlogHer's Press and Discussion Policy for bloggers who would undoubtably be taking pictures and live-blogging throughout the event. I was also going to moderate our very first Naked Blogging Panel, with Ronni Bennett, Koan Bremner (who has taken her blog, Multidimensional Me, down since then), and Heather Armstrong.
Now, there were some heavy hitters on that panel, but it was actually the least of my worries. Rather, I agonized over going over the Press Policy. What if I didn't parlay it correctly and our attendees ran amok videotaping other attendees against their wishes? What if the tone of civil disagreement I had to describe ended up falling on deaf ears? What if I wasn't able to accurately define the tone of respect we needed to achieve?
By the end of the day I was having quite a bit of fun, despite almost falling off the stage, not having a speaker ready and having to ad lib for a few minutes, and choking on my chewing gum. I didn't realize that that day would mark the beginning of my speaking career.
I'd done pitch meetings and short presentations before, and I'd done a lot of presenting over the phone. Yet despite being fairly extroverted, I'd always done by best creative work in private, in writing. Unless I became comfortable presenting that work for live audiences I would always be at odds with myself.
Almost three years later I speak every day, be it describing the BlogHer conference over the phone to a new sponsor, sitting on a panel, or explaining what we do to a large audience. I've been forced to get my word out there, myself. This has been a very liberating experience for me, as I'm hard-pressed to find instances when I cannot take advantage of chance encounters or even create new opportunities from my speaking. I feel expressed and able to represent my hard work and my company. I feel heard.
I believe that public speaking, while nerve-wracking for most, is a suitable gateway for women transitioning in their careers from being hardworking and knowledgeable to being powerful. Yet, surprisingly, after the first BlogHer conference in 2005, when we erected a Speakers Wiki for women to increase their visibility, many in the community opted not to use it.
We were very driven to get the word out about the talent in the women's blogosphere and followed up with attendees to find out why they hadn't opted to promote themselves. The most common answer: I have nothing of importance to say.
This is why I've written a WOMEN'S guide to public speaking; both genders could use basic training, but there are different underlying issues. Quite frankly, men are more likley to think that what they have to say is interesting (sometimes to their detriment) and women, who are often great natural facilitators and promoters of discussion, can often think that driving or dominating a discussion is egomaniacal.
Panel programs like Hardball that feature predominantly men trying to dominate the conversation with their brilliance perpetuate this misperception. But I'm not suggesting that we all learn to wield sharp jabs in verbal combat. I'm talking about using our voices to help others, whether it be to describe your company or teach people to blog. If your goal is to help inform and enlighten, you needn't worry about sparring with others, or about relevance.
In the past I thought that public speaking needed to be a difficult endeavor if I was to be "good" at it; that subjects near and dear to me and so easy to talk about would never be interesting to others. But I suspended my disbelief just long enough to see that this is where there is most opportunity; the aspects of your knowledge that you take for granted can be your most valuable asset.
I've written a practical guide to public speaking the way I know best, from experience. There are some additional, absolutely fantastic guides you should also check out, including my favorites, on Guy Kawasaki's blog.
1. Focus less on blowing people's minds with your words and more on bringing your audience closer to what you are passionate about. I once presented to a women's group about blog strategies for their small businesses. Very early into the talk, I could see that the knowledge level on blogging was much lower than I'd anticipated. I asked my audience at the beginning
