Take my thoughts, Please!

There are just so many things in my head, so I'll dump a few of them here.

1) BlogHer, you're killin' me...please, for the love of Pete...notify the volunteers you selected for BlogHer'13. I've got no nails left, having bitten them to the core in anticipation.

2) I need easy to use (free is good, too) software that will allow me to build a customer tracking database.

3) Why, dear all that is holy, did my mother never tell me that copious amounts of hair could grow On.My.Toes! Seriously, do I need to tip the person who does my pedicure extra if she also braids my toe knuckle hair? What if I add beads?

4) Wanted: Ideas for a Blog Post. Will pay top dollar! And by "top dollar", I mean I'll be your BFF. 

5) If one is expecting a call to arrange an appointment for...say...emergency plumbing service, what sort of logic does one employ that compels one to give a contact phone number checked, like...maybe...once a day...if that?

6) When buying a hybrid, please...PLEASE...buy a model with a gas pedal.

7) The next person who makes me miss a left turn light because they are trying to perform a u-turn, but instead turns it into 12 point turn, because they can't put their fucking phone down, will find themselves cursed to an eternity of anal warts!

8) The world isn't "...coming to..." anything. There has always been evil, violence, hate and destruction of epic levels. Go read a history book. By that very logic...there is an equally epic opportunity for goodness, fairness, kindness and hope.

9) Why the HELL can't Facebook get it through their thick skull that I just want to change my profile picture and that I do NOT want to broadcast said picture to all my friends timelines as well. Just change the picture...that's it. Sheesh!

10) Let's say I were traveling to Chicago this summer and didn't want to carry a laptop, but instead wanted some sort of tablet - what kind should I get? And why?

11) I don't think my cats like their new food. They feel the need to express that dissatisfaction at 5:00 a.m. feeding time by meowing incessantly afterward. They do NOT seem to feel the same at 5:00 p.m. feeding time. On an unrelated note, anyone in need of 3 cats?

12) Step away from the "share" button - just don't. And if you must, at least read it first. OMG, people. OH..EHM..GEEE.

p.s. This post has been brought to you by the letter 'B' for 'B'itchy and 'B'ossy.

p.p.s. I do believe I've expelled a good majority of my PMS angst.

p.p.p.s. Please excuse me while I go shave my toes.

p.p.p.p.s. Oh, like you've never.

p.p.p.p.p.s. You'd think after Midol, 3 glasses of wine and Rocky Road ice cream I'd have a much cheerier disposition.

p.p.p.p.p.p.s. You'd be wrong.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. This post was also brought to you by the letter 'P' for 'P'hooey.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Ha! I bet you thought I was going to use a different word. Like, 'P'fft.



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