Take the Poll: How (Un)Balanced Is Your Life?

As a working mom I write about this pretty regularly on my blog.  I think "balance" is a myth, in so far as it implies you can have it all if you just work hard enough.  For me, "balance" is all about prioritizing what is most important to me and cutting out all the rest, there is only so much time if you want to give the adequate amount of time, focus and energy to what is most important.  

I'd love it if you'd stop by and weigh in on some of my posts on the topic!

Thanks!

Steph

http://problemsolvinmom.blogspot.com

www.twitter.com/psmom ( http://www.twitter.com/psmom )

http://www.sproutforparents.com/sprout/ParentsPlac...

She's my work-around-the-kids mentor (http://www.kidneysandeyes.com -- she owns her own marketing business and has two kids with kidney disorders. Her son had a transplant two years ago and her daughter will have one this fall). Julia told me that balance is a work in progress and not to fret too much when I have a week that goes to hell. I kept thinking I was doing something wrong that one small thing could flip our whole lives upside down (my son's breakdancing class meeting an hour earlier for example) but Julia tells me it's part of the territory.

I'm coming off a decade of being a freelancing, stay-at-home mom whose income was frosting on the family cake and now my paycheck means we can pay our mortgage and buy groceries. I have a full-time job for the first time since before my son was born and telecommute three days a week. I also homeschool the 12-year old and have a very busy just turned 5-year old. My life is nuttier than it has been for a long time and I'm trying to roll with it.

http://www.ThisWomansWork.com

It makes me cringe every time I see work life balance mentioned.

Mostly because it's a total fallacy.

You can't balance work and life because work is part of life. 

It's far more important to respect your own priorities and be present in whatever you choose to do at any given moment or time in your life. 

But that's just what gets me to sleep at night :)

jennydecki

Beyond Mom Blog ( http://beyondmom.com )

For me, the struggle is between all the things I have to do (work stuff, chores, the millions of little tasks that never seem to get completely checked off the list), all the things I need to do for my health or sanity (go to the gym, take time for myself, eat healthy), and, the most neglected list, all the things I want to do to help improve my future (build my blog, write more for me, look for new professional growth opportunities). 

I've gotten myself to the point where I know how important it is for me to do the things to stay healthy (I discovered that exercise is the only natural way to fight my occasional bouts of depression), but it's almost as if I'm trapped in the here and now.  I know that I also need to do things to help create a better future for myself, but the time just isn't there.  As a result, I'm constantly terrified that I'm going to wake up twenty years from now with the same old work dramas and the same lingering feeling that I want more from life. 

How do we create the future we want for ourselves, when we barely have time to live in the present?

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Read more! Next Rich Girl ( http://www.NextRichGirl.com ), a blog for smart women trying to beat the economy: http://www.NextRichGirl.com ( http://www.nextrichgirl.com/ )

Here I am, supposedly on the Balance is a Big Fat McLie for Mommies Who Blog panel at BlogHer, and I don't have any good advice! Well besides asking your husband to stay home and do a lot of heavy lifting, but that's not going to work for everyone...

Angela at mommy bytes ( http://www.mommybytes.com )
BlogHer Contributing Editor in Mommy & Family Cribsheet

My daughter just turned one on the weekend and for the past 12 months I have had pretty much zero balance in my life. The scales of life harmony and balance have been tilting to baby's side for a while.

But I feel that's how it should be. I had my moments for me and I know I get more and more moments as time goes on. I know it's not forever.

I look forward to creating some order in my life once I work this balance thing out. And once all that is in order I'll have some 'me' time. I remember what that used to be like. x

http://fatmumslim.blogspot.com

i used to think that it would be awesome to be one of those people who went off the deep end and committed themselves whole-heartedly to one discipline, endeavor, or pursuit. then i realized that that's the exact opposite of who i am. it took me a while to stop beating myself up that i don't like making up my mind about my ultimate ambition, or my life's purpose. but then i realized, at 27, so far i'm a really happy, healthy person, which is not something i would have envisioned for myself at 15. and that's pretty awesome. 

slowly but surely, things come together. 

reminds me of that quote:

When I was five years old, my mom always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down "happy." They told me I didn't understand the assignment, and I told them they didn't understand life.  

Seven Presidents

Dispatches from the corner of Grant & Washington

http://sevenpresidents.blogspot.com

When the whole world is pushing you over, how can you keep your balance?
The demands that are put on our lives are tremendous but totally invisible and then we wonder what is making us topple.

There is so much possible and because it is possible we think we need to have it, and we are terribly afraid to miss out or make the wrong choice.
For a long time I felt that when I was doing one thing I was bad because I was not doing the other thing.
Because I had so many choices, I actually didn't know what to choose and I was running around not being able to make up my mind, rushing from one thing to another.

I felt lack of peacefulness while I was trying so very hard to do it all.
Now I am working on peacefulness by learning how and what it means to choose and how it is to stick to my choice and no longer have regrets. 

I know that learning to choose will make a big difference. 

As Michelle Obama says; we have many hats. 
And I do agree with her. For a long time I was wearing them all at the same time. Can you imagine how that looks and how that must feel; wearing several hats at the same time because I couldn't choose and then expecting to still feel balanced and in control?

Pull my other leg.
Now I choose one and feel and look normal, well kind of :)

Wilma Ham

www.wilmasblog.com ( http://www.wilmasblog.com/ )

 I must say that as I grow older, I realize that balance comes from deep within.  It is a state of mind first and then a state of body.  If I'm chemically or hormonally off, no matter what I do, I don't feel balanced.  I think that's why yoga has such a large following of women, it definitely helps the mind/body connection and it allows us to "tune-in" to what's going on inside and helps us to feel "okay" with our bodies and our souls.  Now, the challenge is finding "time" for a yoga class...

Kerry Anne Ducey

I'm not a mom and I still find it sometimes difficult to balance all of the things in my life, marriage, school, work, hobbies, house, friends .... I think anyone who wants to live a full life sometimes falls into the trap of being unbalanced or feeling guilty for treating ourselves well.   Thanks for mentioning that this is not something exclusively experienced by Moms.  

kath @ http://www.soeursdudjour.com 

Balance is a constant challenge in this house.  In fact I just wrote about this at the end of March:

http://gavmenagerie.blogspot.com/2009/03/stopping-...

It seems like something always has to give. My work is done, but the house is a mess. I take the kids to the playground, but have to write that article at 11 pm as a result. I'm not sure what the answer is, but I keep working at it. 

Great topic!

 Kimberly 

Come visit my little zoo! Just please don't feed the animals or tap on the glass. http://gavmenagerie.blogspot.com/

I agree that finding balance in life is hard, but so important for us moms to pay attention to.  I always feel bad to buy something for myself, or get my hair cut, but I know that it is something I should do.  We need to get rid of this guilt and take care of ourselves as well as we do our families.  I am learning every day.......

I think all mom's feel this way a lot of the time.  For me, the answer is remembering that we need to be our first priority.  Moms tend to put themselves last.  It's actually healthier for everyone if we put oursevles first.  If momma's not happy, no one's happy.  :)  Plus, we're showing our kids, by example, that it's important to take time to take care of yourself.

http://somuchmorethanamom.wordpress.com/ ( http://m/ )