Happy-Face State of Grace

“How’s your husband doing?” a vaguely familiar lady asked as I stood looking blankly at the library’s free magazine collection.I smiled. “He’s hanging in there,” I assured her. “We leave for San Francisco for further treatments tomorrow.“I’m Alicia, from the furniture store,” she reminded me.“How could I forget?” I had never lived in a small town where people actually remembered details about you. “You were so helpful!”“Did you ever find a recliner?” she asked....more

Joining Forces and The Elizabeth Dole Foundation to Focus on Military Caregivers in 2014

Yesterday I learned some sobering statistics about military caregivers from Joining Forces. 5.5 million Americans are caring for ill or wounded service members and veterans. Of those 5.5 million, 1.1 million of those spouses, parents, and friends are providing care to a US veteran who served since 9/11....more

Where to Look: Miraculous in the Usual

I was immersed in the whistles of high bough song birds and moss so soft and spongy that my knees and feet sunk into the ground. I waited kneeling at the base of majesties. As silent as the arrival of intuition or an angels approach the canopy of my temple opened and the heaven's poured in. Light!“Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer.”  -William S. Burroughs...more

Who is a Caregiver?

There is this issue that has been bugging me for awhile. It is that I feel I am not seen as a caregiver to my husband. It seems that people think of caregivers only as those who tend to the elderly or children. I get a newsletter from the chain of clinics my family sees doctors at. In it I've seen a blurb about a support group for caregivers. Looking closer, I see that it is specifically for those who care for someone who has Alzheimer's....more

AskPatty And Chevrolet Support Safe Kids Day to Keep Your Kids Safe in the Car

According to SafeKids.org, preventable injuries are the #1 killer of kids in the U.S. and each year a million families around the world lose a child to these injuries. We all know kids are going to fall, crash, slip, and explore....it’s part of being a kid....more

Time away provides a vital boost for a caregiver

[This article first appeared on ksl.com on March 27, 2014.]When voices rise to an uncomfortable level at home, when demands on my time feel like walls closing in on me, when the dog seems more of a chore than a source of relaxation, when emotions get stuck on the lowest side of the spectrum for a prolonged time, I drive away....more

Core Values

NaBloPoMo – BlogHer – March 2014Daily Prompt: I Walk the Line by Krista on March 30, 2014Have you got a code you live by? What are the principles or set of values you actively apply in your life?~~~~~~~~The codes I value most in my life are self-respect and respect for others. Without respect, it is hard to have any set of values in your life.I value family and friendships. I am a caring and loving person that enjoys helping others. Inner harmony and spirituality are a large part of my life....more

I May Have Had a Bad Childhood

I may have had a bad childhood.  Let me be clear, I was never beaten.  I came from a good home with good parents.  I say this because I don't remember much from birth to about ten.  Even then, it's just bits and pieces, walking to school, a family trip out East, fragments.  In grade school I became the joker, the class clown.  I had bullies, male and female but I never told my parents.  In those days, the 70's and 80's parents were still authority figures, to be feared....more

10 Things A Sleepless Mama Doesn't Need To Hear

 Rose is a tough sleeper. Some nights, if I'm super, super lucky, she gives me a five hour stretch of sleep. Most nights she wakes every two to three hours. Some nights she just.won't.sleep.I've tried soothing baths, feeding late, feeding early, changing her foods, letting her cry, not letting her cry, physical exercise, a soothing routine...and pretty much nothing has worked. I have been without a good night's sleep for about a year and a half (including the last 3 months of pregnancy, which were pretty uncomfortable for sleep.)...more
Middle of the night hours last between 3 and 65 daytime hours.more

Dementia, The Slow Disaster

“I can deal with shit.” I was making dinner. My mother’s aide had called me. “But not the constipated.” She went on to tell me about having to put her finger up past “clients’” butts when not even enemas did the trick. I was flipping burgers. For dinner. I had to feed my family while discussing feces, the phone cradled on my shoulder. The sizzling ground meat were beginning to look a bit less appetizing.... ...more
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