Seeing Vs. Believing

Who remembers Ricky Paull Goldin? I can't remember which soap opera he was on, but I *think* he was once engaged to Yasmin Bleeth. I remember weird things. Yesterday, me and the fam were watching the Science Channel and a new show called Seeing Vs Believing came on. The premise is Ricky Paull and his co-host, a skeptic, go around meeting people with exceptional abilities and attempt to explain it. Feel free to go watch an episode, it was pretty cool....more

Finding What You're Looking For

It's not often that you find what you're looking for. In fact, it may be that you're not even certain what it is that you've misplaced. The only thing you're certain of is that what ever it was it's now filled the missing piece in your heart. We all have something that makes us incomplete. We live our lives as we should, but if there is something more we could do or get it would make things so much easier. So we continue to live our life with as much enthusiasm that we have....more

How to choose a guardian for your children

When we become parents we are given the beautiful job of loving and raising our children, and being there for them through all of life's ups and downs. To guide them into adulthood and to stand by them as they go on to build their own lives. It's an incredibly sad and unpleasant thought that something could happen to Mark and I, leaving Amelia without both parents. As difficult as it is, establishing guardianship in the event of a tragedy is incredibly important....more

A Black Dress in the Closet

Tonight, while Vivi and I were picking out her clothes for tomorrow, my hand brushed across this black dress hanging in her closet, a dress she's never worn.  Size 7, light hounds tooth with a smocked bodice, a sash, and a lace trimmed color....more

Advice to Couples From a Widow

I used to fantasize sometimes about what it would be like if Dane and I got a divorce. I thought that might just be the best deal ever; I still get my fabulous kid, but I also get a break from her and get some time where I wouldn’t have to care for anyone but myself. I wouldn’t have to rely on someone who I felt was unreliable. I wouldn’t have to share decision-making or, more often, make all of the important decisions by myself....more

Life's Eternal Dance

Sometimes it gets frustrating when every step you move forward, you take three steps back. Although each step you take seems a momentous, moving in the opposite direction can be discouraging. But in the long run,although it's difficult to believe you are where you're supposed to be. Because it's not in the movements that you gauge your life, but the special moments that you experience. It's those breath taking seconds that time seems to stop that make everything else seem to disappear. Think of life as an everlasting dance that you are having with the universe....more

Spinning in the Dark

I feel like a caged bird that needs to fly. If I didn't have a third-grade daughter, I would be gone. I would travel. I would be living my own "Eat, Pray, Love." I need to rediscover myself, figure out what I truly want in this new life of mine. But I feel like I can't do it here. In my same home. My same city. I feel suffocated by sameness.Even if I did pull my daughter out of school, I can't fly away with her. She likes the comfort of our cage: her home, her school, her friends, her visits with her dad....more

Collective Motherhood

When my first child was born, he didn't know how to sleep and I didn't know how to help him.  Most nights he and I were up alone, rocking, walking, singing, nursing. The room was quiet and dark, but instead of feeling like I was the only one awake in the world, I could almost feel all the other new mothers out there, who were also up rocking and nursing and singing with me. ...more

Taking Time

I'm going to take my time to smell the roses. To slow down when I walk because running doesn't seem to get me to where I'm going any faster. Life has been a blur for awhile, that everything looks the same. Funny when I actually make an effort to take the time to look around, things begin to take on other meaning. Everything becomes much more clearer. Suddenly, it's okay to just be where I am. My senses are capturing all the things that I've been missing. Taking my time, I can now do all the things that I've wanted to do but never thought I could fit in my busy schedule....more

Never the Same

Early in 1976, Daddy came home and said to Mama, “I bought something today.”“Uh oh.”“It’s not for us. It’s for our grandkids.” (His daughters were 10, 16, and 19.)“Uh oh.”“I bought that lake cabin.”...more