Five and a Half Ways The Baby is a Big Disappointment to the Toddler

It should be made clear at the outset that The Toddler loves The Baby. The Toddler is very proud of The Baby. She likes to show The Baby to anyone and everyone: 'My sis!' Nonetheless, The Baby is, on occasion, a big disappointment to The Toddler; and here are five and a half reasons why.1. She sits on her bottom when she has been explicitly told, several times: 'Come on, The Baby! Quick, quick!'...more

You Complete Me: Lies Dating Websites Have Told Me

I saw this Christian Mingle commercial on TV the other night which stated, “There’s someone out there who needs you, whose life you can fulfill and who makes yours complete.”I nearly launched myself off the couch and body slammed the TV to the floor.Like this… except no one was wearing a thong…...more

I Get to Work From Home! Now What Do I Do With the Children?

My exciting new job has me working from home. But school is almost over, and my kids will be home all summer. They're too old for babysitters, so what do I do to keep them away from me for the four hours a day I need to work? ...more
BallofWax Great plan. Especially the part about teaching them to start dinner. My mom did that, ...more

Why I'm Breaking Up With Rural Life

Two things happened today that require me to break up with this country life I've been living:1. There was a gang fight between 2 birds and one was murdered. Or at least that's what I believe led to the carcass outside my front door....more
lolmore

Eating My Weight in Crap Food

So, while I’ve been waiting to hear back about the job, I’ve taken up a new hobby:Eating my weight in crap food.It’s pretty fantastic. And an awesome stress reliever....more
I get rampantly hungry a few days before. I just can't be sated. it's a tell-tale sign. Eat up, ...more

Are you really scared of clowns?

When asked what I am afraid of, I will list two things: Snakes and clowns....more
I'm pretty indifferent. I had a friend who dressed up as a clown for a charity even. He told me ...more

I'm Okay, Thanks: Developing Language

The other day, as The Toddler carefully (& oh so inexplicably) arranged her tea set in front of the stair gate in the hallway, Silly Mummy called to her from the living room, 'How're you doing, The Toddler?' Her little voice replied, 'I'm okay, thanks, Mummy.' This may be the most grown up thing Silly Mummy has heard her say, and highlights just how far her language has developed in a few short months....more

I'm Batman

The Toddler has a plastic toy shopping basket ('bask shop') on her head. 'I'm Batman! Batman, Mummy!'...more

Target Forced Me To Be Fair

Helpful Tips to Survive Head Lice

My kids have just gotten head lice for the second time in their lives. The first time was a few years ago, and I’m still in therapy over that one. This bout of head lice caught me completely by surprise. I thought we’d never get it again. I assumed it was like surviving a plane crash. I mean, what are the odds it would ever happen again? ...more
Ugh - we had a run in with lice from summer camp two years ago. I wanted to power wash the ...more