CVC, Or co-parenting with an ex-abuser SUCKS

I know it could be worse.  I also know I need to stop expecting it to suck, because even though it does, having a crappity crap attitude about it doesn’t help.  Or so I tell myself.Vent alert:  looking back, at every juncture where there is a co-parenting “issue,” I can’t think of ONE scenario where the ex has chosen the peaceful route.  If there was a button, i.e. “How to make this crap more stressful,” he hits it every time.  Let’s call this my CVC, which sounds like a weird STD, but stands for my Cynical View on Co-parenting....more

The One Thing That Suffers When You Are Over-Scheduled

I can honestly say if I don't schedule dates with my husband they don't happen. I do know the ...more

10 Ways to Re-Claim Yourself After a Break-up

RenaA break up can be a wake up call – to yourself. After tears, anger and blame comes hopefully, a time for healing and self-reflection.It’s also a time to re-claim yourself. Rediscover the you that is still there, even though you may be on your own. Of course, this sounds so easy and common sense, right? But the fact is, many women lose themselves in their relationships and with the busy-ness that comes with child-rearing (for those who have them) and truly have to dig a little to allow the time to focus on themselves....more

D- Day

I am officially a divorcee.  The papers stuck unceremoniously out of my mailbox when we got home this afternoon.  There was a little while there when only I knew.  The boys went about the business of fighting and emptying spent lunches into the sink, oblivious to the fact that I was processing the end of 18 years (6 of which we were separated).  I suspected not even their father knew it was official....more

Ellie's Guide To Theoretical Dating, Volume One: Bad First Impressions

Before I get into actual dating again, I've decided that I need - as Dolores Umbridge would so heartily endorse -  a more practical, theoretical approach. In other words, I'm going to think about it and talk about it a lot before I actually get out there and really, you it.So here's the first part of my theoretical approach to dating: There will be second chances.Let me explain....more


I just wanted to send a little thought out into the universe:  today I’m feeling so very thankful.  ...more

Our Final Anniversary After 18 Years of Marriage

My husband and I celebrated our 18th wedding anniversary at a fancy restaurant. After he ordered an expensive bottle of wine, he reached into his pocket and pulled out his gift to me. It was a handwritten list of treasured memories from our marriage. Memories, he said, that reminded him of how much we belonged together....more
Wonderful, and true, We are always afraid to live our lives and pursue our happiness out of fear ...more

My Thoughts On What Lifetime TV Did To My Memoir

Ever since the premiere date of The Secret Sex Life of a Single Mom was announced (May 31st on Lifetime) , I’ve been inundated with the same questions by people:  Have you seen the movie and what was it like to watch it?  What do I, as the author of the book, think of the movie?...more

Constant vigilance, or how holding the line can make you cry.

I’m sitting here shaking a little bit inside.  It’s a familiar feeling, one that comes after I’ve stood up for myself and the girls, and even though I’ve done it with the recommendation of my attorney and support of my therapist, and attorney friends (see how badly I need validation?), I am still shaking, tears welling up. ...more

Even Fairytale Romances Can End In Divorce

People have always loved the story of how my husband and I ended up together. We met in college and dated for three terrible months. I love love LOVED him, and he could not have been more indifferent to me. Our romance lasted through the summer, even though he went home to Detroit to work at his hard-hitting job serving ice cream. ...more
"Insert Price is Right losing horn here."more