Death of a Marriage... Waking up to the truth

Walking around with wax in your ears…Lately numerous articles are being written about narcissists. One such article appeared in a local magazine in South Africa, I showed it to my mother, and I think we both cried for days.Why did we cry because that was my father, my mother’s husband, my ex husband. We finally had a word for what we were going through and that was freeing....more


I was asked "What are your goals?"To get divorced."No, a GOAL."Um, that 'is' a goal?Apparently, it isn't.  And apparently, since it's all I think about, I have NO goals.How about THAT?Yep, I didn't see it either.The only immediate goal I have is to get to trial in March.  That's the one thing I have as a wish.  A focus.  A need.  A want.But alas, not a goal.  So I'm informed.So?  I stared blankly.  I got NOTHING.  ...more

Death of a Marriage...

and, I now pronounce you...Honestly, the best way I can describe what I went through was like a crazy horror movie, that is just never ending.I would not wish this on my worst enemy. The death of a marriage, is nothing anyone can understand until you have gone through it yourself. People are easy to critize by saying, you just gave up, or why did you not try harder, or my favourite, it's a sin....more
Thanks so much for your post.  I know exactly how it feels.  It has been about a year and a half ...more

How to Get Over a Broken Heart

Everyone wants to know how to get over a broken heart.  And yet, if you’re willing to let a breaking heart have it’s way with you, if you’re willing to pay the price of suffering the insufferable, what’s on the other side of that is evolution of the most beautiful kind.Most people live in the grey areas, the spaces in between the dark and the light.Most people try to avoid the lows at all costs.  They aren’t comfortable in the depths.Most people strive for equanimity and stability....more

The Even Keel

I’ve received an interesting inquiry from the Ex.  It has to do with a pending work trip for him, which would cut short his week end with the children.  He is proposing a few options, swapping week ends altogether, cutting the week end short and swapping just one of the days, or just having grandma watch the children (?).  ...more

Tricks or Treats? Coparenting and Hallowe'en

Your custody schedule probably contemplated all of the big holidays - but what about the small ones?Today I'm over at DivorcedMoms talking about my issues with scheduling Hallowe'en with the Goblin King!...more

I Have Seen The Enemy, And The Enemy Is Me

This started out as a post about my diet. Honest....more

Dr. Romance on: 11 things people won't tell you about divorce

 There's a lot of misinformation about divorce, and Dr. Romance would like to clear up some of the confusion.Here are 11 things people will not tell you about divorce....more

Separating from your spouse? Say hello to Mr. Panic Attack

Other kids had imaginary friends growing up, I had panic attacks. I think I had my first panic attack when I was four. I remember a big one when I was seven, visiting Opryland. I began hyperventilating during a stage show medley of country classics and had to be taken to their medical center. (But really, was it a panic attack or a way to get the hell out of Opryland?...more

Adult children of divorce

As I have mentioned before, my parents divorced when I was young. There is no doubt in my mind that it was the best decision for both of them. There is also no doubt in my mind that it was a hard decision for them to make. ...more