Dearest Readers

Dearest readers,Can we talk?I wanna tell you a secret.In my not-so-distant past, I've settled for less.I've journeyed the rugged, tar-black roads of lies about who I am.  Maybe you’ve traveled similar paths.  If so, you know the routes spewing filth and dust. The kind of dust that sticks to your skin like black tar, lingering for days, weeks, years. Whispering lies about who you are....more

Fictional Date Night with Kanye West

It’s time for another fictional date night. Valentines Day, has inspired thoughts of a delightful V-day date night with America’s Most Wanted: Kanye West. Get on the chocolate train of love, my friends, this man is virile and lusty with an insatiable appetite for love. Date Night with Kanye West ...more

How to Feel Sexy on Valentine's Day With Health Issues

Valentine's Day is approaching, and while many people plan romantic evenings, the holiday can put a lot of pressure on those of us struggling with infertility or chronic illness. The combination of medication, fluctuating hormones, and vacillating emotions often results in a complete lack of libido. So what can you do if infertility or chronic illness has left you feeling not-so-frisky this February 14th? Here are five tips to help you celebrate and enjoy even if you're not "in the mood." ...more

Back to marketing my book on sexual abuse

 My book about childsexual abuse and how you heal is Enfolded in Silence/A Story in Art of Healing from Sexual Trauma in Childhood (amazon.com). Now that I am back in the country, I am working on marketing it. I believe it is a helpful book for survivors of abuse, therapists who work with them, adolescents and those interested in getting an insdie view of sexual abuse and the healing process. ...more

50 Shades of My Opinion!

Fifty Shades of Grey comes out this weekend.  I confess, I've read the whole book series, and you know what? For the most part, I liked it.  Sure, it's not realistic, according to the true BDSM -ers (if you haven't checked out Fetlife.com, you don't know about serious BDSM -ers), but for us "mostly vanilla" folks, it's fun fantasy fodder (go me, with the alliteration!).  I know that when I first read it, and got to the "checklist," it caused quite a frank discussion among my lady-friends and my husband....more

Seven Ways to Ensure that You have a Long and Great Sex Life?

Just like the butterflies find its way towards the nectar of a flower, men and women should act like the nectar in order to attract each other. This is is never easy especially with women of the orthodox nature. However it is not impossible to fine tune your life and habits to please each other. A few of these tips could contribute in the process....more

She’s Just Not That Into You: The Book That Should Have Been Written

Disclaimer: This article is about heterosexual relationships because it is written from my own experience, but I’m sure there are similarly interesting things to say about same-sex relationships, and I hope we can talk about them too.Don’t want. Don’t act. Sit there and look pretty so that a man will make the first move. “You’ve got to get him to say hello.”Field advances; don’t make them. Be the gatekeeper, not the one walking through the door....more

Sexual Self-Care: 10 Valentine's Day Lingerie Ideas for All Body Types

I have a confession to make: I've spent more time over the past 18 months thinking about how tied my self-esteem is to my desirability than I had the entire previous 30+ years.The reasons for this are twofold: 1. I had a baby and 2. I went through a breakup. My confidence took a nosedive for awhile. I'm honestly still working on it, but the number one lesson I've learned is how imperative self-care is. Mental, spiritual, physical...sexual. True story.What's Sexual Self-Care?...more
This was a great article! thanks for the ideas.more

How Abstinence Helped My Self-Love Journey

I never thought much about abstinence. I mean, growing up with Nigerian parents, I was told to wait till marriage. There was no conversation about sex in general; I was just told not to do it....more
MommyKerrie That is an amazing story! Thanks so much MommyKerrie for sharing, I appreciate it.more

Valentine's Day and the Single Woman: Gifting Yourself and Others

Travel back with me, if you will, to the worst Valentine's Day of my life. (No, really, please, come with me. I hate to go there alone.) The first thing I saw when I walked in the door was a large print hanging over our apartment fireplace: an image of two children dressed in Victorian grownup clothes, colorized blush on their cheeks. The little boy knelt down in front of the girl, handing her a rose. My boyfriend stood there smiling, proud of himself, waiting for my reaction to his mall-bought Mona Lisa. ...more
I just wrote a post about being single on Valentine's Day! The day you have planned sounds ...more