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In this week’s Ten Money Questions, we speak with Adryenn Ashley, an outspoken pundit, constitutional scholar, speaker and author of the new book, Every Single Girl’s Guide to Her Future Husband’s Last Divorce, dubbed as an all access pass to the world of second marriages. Read on to hear what she has to say about money and matrimony. Consider it a sneak peek to what she’ll be touting at the virtual Wealthy Girl Summit on January 24th to 27th, 2008.
1. What are three things that women can learn in your book about protecting their assets?
Why Co-Mingling Is For Cocktail Parties! Keeping your assets separate is only good business practice... remember, "Don't put all your eggs in one basket!"? That's because you could drop the basket. Then what? So keeping your assets separate ensures that if one pot of gold is stolen, you have more to live on.
You don't hand over your purse strings to every new business partner, and you shouldn't give away the store, or the bank, to a new relationship or spouse. At least when you are buying a business there is a financial checklist to determine the overall business health of a company. Until now, there hasn't been the same unbiased checklist for marriage. And remember, this is a checklist to see IF you are going to marry him. You already said yes. Now you just need to determine how to structure the deal!
Busy girls out earning a living rarely do their own taxes, and even if they do, Turbo Tax is a down and dirty way to do it fast without getting too deep. Problem is, without getting deep into it, you might now know or understand the laws that make up the reasons WHY certain rules apply or what they mean to your situation. If your future hubby's divorce decree says he pays his ex $2000 per month for 3 years in alimony, would you really know that if the order is over $10,000 per year he must be legally obligated to pay for more than 5 years to make it tax deductible? This is how smart folks get in trouble. Your CPA doesn't read the decree, and if you are a DIY type, some of the obscure exceptions can land you on the losing end of an audit!
2. What is your most significant memory about money?
I could count money before I could count money. My grandfather used to "accidentally" drop a bunch of change on the floor, seemingly escaping from a non-existent hole in his pocket. I would scamper over at age 2 and pick it up and count it. That's when my love all things shinny got started.
3. What is your worst habit around finances?
I underestimate my misc. expenses. I've done random audits and found that when I estimate my misc. expenses I'm about 30% low. So in order to really take advantage of my earning power, I need to get a firmer grip on where the cash outlays go and make sure they are all necessary and deductible.
4. I understand that you married a divorce man. Are finances treated differently in your relationship verses his first wife?
In his first marriage, he handed over the money and she ran the finances. He had little to no oversight. Why would he? She was a professional bookkeeper! Even after we were married she was still handling most of his finances. Now I handle them, but it is still very much separate. He's got his money and assets, I have mine. We have separate trusts and estate plans as well. In his first marriage, she made all the decisions on how the money was spent and there was never any left over. In our relationship, I make sure he always has adequate money available, and he can make his own decisions on what to buy and when without having to ask permission. Most women would be in shock over this, but he's never had more than $20 at a time to spend, so for him, going hog wild is spending $80 on a pair of fantastic and comfortable work boots instead of $19.99 at Big 5. So it's never been an issue that he'll spend too much!
5. How can a pre-nup be romantic?
If you look at it from the right perspective, your
