Need a Last-Minute Halloween Costume? Channel Your Inner Lady Gaga, Sookie or Farrah

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People tend to fall into one of two categories in most things in life: Traditionalists or Modernists. Where do you fall on Halloween costumes?  Do you go traditional and pile on the monster gore like these nasties captured by blogger and photographer Aimee Greeblemonkey during the Denver Zombie Crawl. Witches, monsters, serial killers -- Halloween can be a night to get good and ugly. 
It's certainly the season to get creative, like blogger Adam Avitable who hosts an annual art happening/Avitaween party, with an open invitation to the entire blogosphere.  Bloggers Britt and Hilly attended as Madonna and a Queen. Classic!
I tend to be a modernist.  I say never turn down a chance to call yourself a V.I.P, channel the zeitgeist and celebrate your favorite media stars or characters.  Don't worry if you are afraid it's too late.  There are plenty of easy red carpet ideas inspired by movies and television to help you rock out with your pop culture out on All Hallow's Eve.
The buzz is that this year, Kate Gosselin and Lady Gaga costumes (tutorial from Threadbanger) are the frontrunners for Most Topical Costume Oscar.  I love the Kate Gosselin or Octomom costume concept, because you can rope your family members and friends into dressing as your children and then you can make them get your drinks for you all night long. Or just stuff your shirt with a bag of oranges and go as Pregnant Octomom, and then you can eat candy for two, plus two, plus more.  Nadya Suleman dressed as a pregnant nun herself, in a fine bit of self-satire. On the other hand, Renee at Womanist Musings wasn't amused by the racism inherent in the Octomom costume publicized on The View.
Maybe you'd prefer a motherhood costume that is more fiction-driven. If you have a few minutes, a grand Benjamin Button costume would be to mount a photo of Brad Pitt's face to a doll, for you to carry dressed as an old, old, old Cate Blanchett or his nurse Nana.
A gorgeous idea for this year is to go as a swank Mad Men lead.  If you have a beautiful dress or Don Draper suit, you probably are thrilled for the excuse to wear it.  Or you can not go wrong smoking a pack of cigarettes in a smoking Betty Draper nightgown.  Even better, I would give all of my Skittles and most of my chocolate to a partygoer dressed as Joan in a red wig, structured Playtex bra and slinky slip. I don't know if she has ever appeared in Mad Men with this part of her outfit fully showing, but you know it's there.
The big movie costume theme this year is Where the Wild Things Are. If you are worried you don't have enough time to pull off an actual Wild Thing like amazing Sarah Clark, take the easy way out and simply add ears and a gold crown to a hat or a hoodie for instant Max appeal.  I'm guessing you won't be alone in your rumpus making.
Some more easy no-Zombie-brainers include:
Serena Williams --Tennis clothes and a racket with a sign attached (words of your choice or Serena's).
Star Trek --This year's film may not have been your father's Star Trek, but you can go ahead an borrow his costume or Spock ears
Balloons -- You can pick between Balloon Boy or Up for your theme with this must-have 2009 accessory.
The Box -- Another prop costume that you can play two ways.  BECOME the Box, or just CARRY one.  I would issue "Morality Tickets" to anyone who chooses to push the button telling them who died because of their greed.  Charo? Walt Disney's brain? E.T? Perhaps Elvis--because he WAS alive until the button was pressed.
Cheerios' Coach Sue from Glee -- Track suit + bullhorn + stopwatch = you get to say things like "You think that's hard?  Try being waterboarded. That's hard."
Derby Girl from Whip-It --How can you turn down a chance to wear torn fishnets, a Girl Scout uniform and a lot of eyeshadow? In public?
Dead Celebrities are a specialty within the Modernist genre.  Paying homage to Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett or Billy Mays would be very sweet.  Also, not dead, but her career may be:  this might be your last year to go at Paula Abdul, so go girl!
Of course, you can have the best of both Traditional and Modern world with vampires, the master monster of 2009. I'm sure every party will have enough True Blood and New Moon vampires to drain a blood bank.  Don't forget the option of dressing as Vamp Lover Sookie Stackhouse, in short shorts, a Merlotte's T and a cute little gap between your front teeth.  But if you like flowing robes, scarves and fruit, play it as Maryann.  As a benefit you may find you have the power to shake like an egg timer and incite a Bacchanalia to keep the Halloween festivities rolling on through El Dios de las Muerte and on towards Thanksgiving.
Unless you are keeping it a masked surprise, I'm dying to know who you're dressing up as this year. Even IF it is a surprise, I want to know. I won't tell a (living) soul!
Contributing Editor Deb Rox is trick-or-treating as Don Draper. She expects to get a pumpkin full of cigarettes and airplane bottles of scotch. 


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