Is there anybody out there? Nod if you can hear me.

It’s funny. I think of myself as a fairly technical and handy person.  That is, except when it comes using the telephone. I don’t know what it is about the phone.  It isn’t a new gizmo or gadget.  It shouldn’t be difficult to use.  But, to me, for whatever reason it is.  I guess I am just not telephone savvy.  Call waiting still throws me for a loop, I always lose someone.  When I try to transfer a call at work to another person’s extension, without fail I always end up hanging up on the poor person I was trying to transfer.  The only way I can manage a conference call is to use a call in number. If I try to coordinate conferencing in two lines on my own, the result is never pretty.

The other day, I received a call and the person on the other line told me that they had to add in another person.  “Hold on,” they said. “I am just going to get Wilbur.”

I was briefly placed on hold.  Seconds later the girl who called me said, “Hello.  Wilbur, are you there?”

There was no Wilbur.  It was just me.

“Ok.  Let me try this again she said.”  This time when she placed me on hold, she hung up on me.

Seconds later, my phone rang again.

“I don’t know what happened that time,” she explained.  “I am going to try again.”  Again, she hung up on me.

I am smiling now.  I no longer feel so bad not being able to use the phone.  I realize I am not alone.

My reflection is short lived as she calls once again.  “I don’t know what is happening,” she says, this time more flustered than before. “I do know how to use the telephone.  Hang on again.”

Seconds later, once again I hear, “Wilbur?  Wilbur, are you there?” Like before, no Wilbur.

“Ugh!  This is nuts,” she exclaims.  “I don’t know what is going on. Hang on Hilary, I am getting help.”

Her assistant came to the rescue.  “Hi, Hilary,” she said.  “Hang on. I am going to try it this time.”  Seconds later, I hear her assistant say, “Wilbur?  Are you there?”

Unlike before, Wilbur was there.

“Great,” she said.  “Hilary?  Are you here?”

The question was met with silence.

“Hilary?”

Silence…. The first girl asked, “How did we lose her now?”

One more time they asked, “Hilary, are you there?”

This time their question was met with laughter.  Hey, I couldn’t help myself.

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