Thong 101: Stepping up to sexier underwear for Valentine's Day
Valentine's Day is on the horizon so for those of you who find it among the most dreaded days the year, you might want to skip this post. But if you're the type who's hoping to get a little something-something going with your sigOth on the 14th, or hoping that Mr. Right Now magically morphs into Mr. Right, standing at your front door with a dozen roses and the offer to wax your car for you, read on.
We're talking about thongs.
Now if the first thing that comes to mind is, "Ack! Butt floss!" while you make the sign of the cross with your fingers then yikes - get that scary image out of your head. That's a g-string, not a thong. A good thong should ideally lie flat against your derriere instead of creeping up between the cheeks too much. It should also make you feel more comfortable, not more like a pole dancer.
There's hardly a day that I don't wear a thong (and yes, I am oversharing in the name of sisterly lingerie magnanimity.) and let me assure you, I have no supermodel arse to speak of.
The way I see it, here are the major benefits:
1. Wearing nice lingerie can make you feel a little better about yourself, even if there's no one to see it but you and your 18 cats.
2. No visible panty line. That's big.
3. You are always prepared for um...you know. Stuff. That might happen. Stuff that involves someone seeing your underwear.
4. Granny panties are scary. Even if you are in fact a granny.
If you're new to the world of thongage, I strongly recommend Hanky Panky as your starter brand which by all intents and purposes makes the world's most comfortable thong (circle R). The cotton panel is comfy, and because the lace band stretches and then snaps back into shape, one thong will fit sizes 4-14 which I can attest to first-hand. Because I've been all of those sizes. There are plus sizes available for curvy girls too.
When you're wearing something a littler more form-fitting and lacy lingerie won't do, check out Commando Intimates which lay completely smooth. But I wouldn't wear them every day because they're not all-cotton. I will say no more about that.
For special occassions like Valentine's Day, I'm all about Cosabella. The Never Say Never Cutie Low-Rider (shown at top) is both adorable and mercifully, super comfy. Because what good is wearing sexy lingerie if you're going to squirm through your entire overpriced prix fixe dinner?
All of these thongs and more are available at the delightful and reasonably priced HipUndies.com
So spill it ladies - are you a thong evangelist? A special ocassion thong-er? Or would you sooner swear yourself to celibacy than wrestle your posterior into something besides your oversized, baggie briefs thankyouverymuch?
Liz Gumbinner is a contributing editor to BeautyHacks, and the co-editor of Cool Mom Picks, the influential shopping blog for parents.