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This is the beginning of my journey to end binge eating. I'm a junior in college and I've hit rock bottom. Bingeing has been a coping mechanism I've used on and off since high school, but never have I binged this frequently or with such large quantities of food as I have lately. Bingeing is interfering with my schoolwork, my friendships, my self esteem, and my happiness. It's time for this to end. I've been trying to stop for awhile now, but I think a big part of me has not wanted to give it up yet. I've known what I'm doing is bad, but I've told myself "I don't care, I'm doing it anyway" time and again. I'm ready to give up this habit and work on myself to be able to do that. I know what I need to do, but now I need to follow through. It's going to be really really tough because I'm going to have to figure out other ways to deal with my loneliness, anxiety, and sadness. My body deserves a lot more love and respect than I've been giving it lately. Although I doubt anyone will be reading this it feels like I have to be more accountable this way.
Never let 'em see you when you're breaking
Never let 'em see you when you fall
That's how we live and that's how we try
Tell the world you've got it all together
Never let them see what's underneath
Cover it up with a crooked smile
But it only lasts for a little while
There's no such thing as perfect people
There's no such thing as a perfect life
So come as you are, broken and scarred
Lift up your heart and be amazed
And be changed by a perfect God
