There's no denying we're truly into October, now (no matter what the 80-degree temps here in Georgia may feel like), and that means that those of us with kids in school are starting to receive Halloween Paperwork. For us, it's requests for help with room parties, as well as "helpful" memos about what will and will not be tolerated at school in terms of Halloween celebration.

The schools my children attend now don't allow costumes, for example, although they've always had Halloween parties; it's not a refusal to acknowledge the day, just an unwillingness to deal with wardrobe changes, which I think is fair. When we lived in New England, costumes were allowed, albeit with a list of rules as long as my arm about what constituted appropriate dress (nothing too scary, nothing obscuring the face, nothing that required a teacher's assistance, nothing that hampered mobility, etc.).

I've also, over the years, gotten instructions for school Halloween that included such earnest requests as "nothing sugary," which, well, what kid doesn't look forward to the big day and and a chance to stand around with carrot sticks?

Still, I realize we've been lucky. We've never found ourselves at a school where celebration of Halloween was banned, nor do I care if one day a year I'm invited to smell my children's stinky feet. To me, Halloween is a day for sugar and fun, and nothing more (or less).

Objections come, it seems, from religions who fear the holiday is either harmful or religious or both. You could spend a good chunk of time doing research on the origins of Halloween, but the bottom line is that it had religious motivation back in the day (and actually, that includes paganism and Wicca) and was adapted and celebrated in all sorts of ways, yes. Today, however, I think many of us agree it has become a harmless secular holiday. To some, though, it remains an affront to their religion, and therefore something they'd rather schools not foist upon all.

The issue is still a hot one, if the recent Edutopia poll by Sara Bernard is any indication. One commenter says:

Please give me a break! Why can't some 6-10 year olds have something fun to look forward to at school. We already take all of the fun out of school for many students with Open Court Reading, Prescription Math, Accelerated Reading, etc. Let kids be kids! If no one has to stand and place their hand over their heart and recite the Pledge of Allegiance then they certainly do not have to participate in a holiday celebration. If parents choose to keep them home, ok. They will only get really crabby becuasue it will cost them day care $$, which most of the families see is the main value for school in the early years.

While another commenter notes:

As a former principal of a large elementary school, Halloween was a fun day enjoyed by all (teachers, students and parents). My concern today is based on some parents telling me it that Halloween is the only "religious" holiday they celebrate. They were Wiccans. In some circles it is considered a religious holiday like Christmas and Christians are not allowed to celebrate that in the schools. Public school personnel need to be aware and sensitive to the diversity in our ever changing culture.

And therein lies the rub, I suspect -- did Halloween start seeming like a bad idea (vs. harmless fun) to religious folks when they realized some other people really felt it was a devotional holiday...?

Jen at Moms Like Me wants to know what's going on:

If I were living or traveling in another country I would want to (and my children) to want to experience the festivals and religious holidays of the countries in which I was traveling/living. I would not want them to change it or dilute it in order not to offend me. I am well grounded in my religious beliefs and am confident in the intelligence of my children that they will make good decisions about their future. We are a melting pot of people who respect each other. So, what are we doing by banning a decades old tradition of putting a Bible verse on a sports banner. What are we doing to our children by changing the school parties too "Fall party" instead of Halloween..."Holiday party" instead of Christmas, "Spring Party" instead of Easter? What foundations...traditions are we giving them.......

The ensuing conversation touches on tolerance and diversity, but also points out that teachers are often in a difficult position here because of both parents' concerns and a climate of "teaching to the test" and needing every moment of instructional time for that.

A teacher on the A to Z Teacher Stuff forums asks if Halloween is banned at anyone's school, and the responses range from "we all dress up, even the principal!" to "we're not allowed to do anything and I hate it." Just a very broad spectrum of experiences and reactions.

WomensForum.com traces the history of Halloween and the increase in schools refusing its celebration, too.

I'll tell you a secret; I like Halloween. I'm all for a chance for kids to be silly and eat junk once in a while. And I don't think that makes me a pagan or a bad mom.

So tell me... does your child's school have a Halloween party? Is it okay with you (whether they do or don't)? Am I trivializing the supposed danger, or are schools being silly?

BlogHer Contributing Editor Mir also blogs about issues parental and otherwise at Woulda Coulda Shoulda, and about the joys of mindful retail therapy at Want Not.