Toxic people it's not your problem, it's their problem!
By Elaine's Daily Om on July 14, 2014
We all have people who come into our life that are so toxic, so scorching, that just being near them you feel the burning heat radiating from their negativity. So many times these people live just to inflict their pain on anyone who comes into their universe. That is the only way they can feel good about themselves to create pain for others. Their helplessness in life is only masked by controlling others with their toxic behavior. If you can just get these toxic people out of your life, cold, just don't have anything to do with them. Run, fast , don't look back just go. That's easy when you can just eliminate the person from your life. It's a little harder when the person is someone that is not so easy to cut out of your life. What if you work with the person or the person is a family member. If there is no way possible to cut the offending person from your life then you have to neutralize their behavior before you get burned.
How can you do that you ask? If you think about dealing with a toxic person the way to negate their behavior is to not fuel their fire. Don't give them any ammunition to feed their rants and negativity. Don't react, don't add to the drama- without letting them know smother the fire by not engaging. You cannot control others you can only control yourself so just do that. Don't personalize their behavior, it isn't about you, it's about them. Be mindful, pulling back and observing the toxic person, don't engage. don't confront, these types of actions are exactly the reaction the offending person is soliciting, that they need to fuel their fire. By not engaging, getting caught up in all consuming actions with the offending person, you are free from their controlling actions. By pulling back from active combat you are not giving control or credence to them, you are not sucked into their negative vortex. It sounds cold but you need to let the person know by your actions that you just don't care what they say or do. Nothing they do can effect you or control you cause it is not you it is them. You are in control of your actions and reactions, not any one else, remember that all the time! If you don't forget that you will be free from being effected by any association with toxic people who can be a real problem.
Life is so easy to navigate when you know deep in your being that you are in control, that you are the one who can take others negativity in or better keep it out. Don't ever let others pain become yours by activity engaging in their actions to share their pain with you. You are not helping the other person, nor are you helping yourself by fanning their fire of pan. Instead don't add any fuel to their raging fire, control your reactions and you will positively control a very negative situation. Always remember don't take it personally it is not about you it's about them!