I've had a few mothers in my lifetime. My favorite is my birthmother. I know because I was in foster care, and she hit me pretty badly growing up that some of you might get the impression that I had a bad mother, but I didn't. I tend to view outcome rather then process, and when I look at my mothers work I think she did an amazing job. I think just the fact that she raised a child aware enough to put herself and her sister into foster care when things were too crazy is evidence of the amazing mothering skills she had.

She wasn't an easy mom. She yelled a lot and wasn't fond of cleaning up after me, but the gifts she gave me are more then I can ever thank her for. Like my love for music. She used to sing to me all the time, and would make up silly little songs. She told me stories about the milky way, and would point out all the different star constellations in the sky. She used big words, and respected me enough to know that I would understand them. She taught me to read before I learned in school, and she told me I should be a philosopher when I grew up because she listened to what I had to say and found wisdom there. She also said lots of crazy mean things, but she was honest enough to let me know she was a little crazy and she actually asked me to tell her all the mean things she ever said to me so she could take responsibility for them. Then she listened to what I said and apologized.

She and I don't spend a whole lot of time together mostly because we're both so independent, but when I talk with her on the phone I feel connected with her in a way that no one on the planet makes me feel connected. She tells me beautiful things about myself, and because she was brave enough to tell me the truth regardless of how hard it was for her, I believe the things she says.

She raised me a warrior in a world where people don't stand up for what they believe. She may have hit me, but she taught me how not to get hit by other people, learning how to navigate the paths that would lead to her anger taught me to step lightly on other peoples boundaries. And because I could speak my mind to her and bring her to her self again when no one else could, I learned that I can bring peace to otherwise chaotic situations. Because I can actually do these things I have also learned to take responsibility for times when I don't .

She taught me to tell the truth no matter how much it hurts. The truth is an amazingly powerful force when used with good intention. The reason for this is that humans know when we're being lied to. The only reason it looks like we don't is that for many of us believing in something other then the truth is so much easier. When we actually hear the truth however it cuts like a knife through all of the bullshit we like to live in, and I've actually seen it leave people stunned to silence.

Here is the truth about mothers.

They are our path to knowing who we really are. They hold the maps inside their heads to the greatness living within each of us. They have worked harder then any other person will ever work just so that we can be, and when life gets hard we hate them for bringing us here. They will never get the credit they deserve for being the gods that they are because our fathers distract us from our mother's greatness mostly because they live in fear of our mother's power. Or we have extraordinary fathers who bless the ground they walk on and the groud that we walk on, in which case balance is being restored to this planet one father at a time. The truth about fathers is they all wish they could be mothers.

We should honor our mothers regardless of the pain we think they may have caused us because I can guarantee it is nothing compared to the pain we cause them.

That is the truth about moms.

Addendum: My mother asked me to include that the reason she acted so crazy for so many years is that she had a horrible thyroid imbalance that mimicked bi-polarism and she was misdiagnosed for a very long time.