Twelve Relationship Truths since it's 12/12/12

*disclaimer - no I'm not a relationship expert. Nor do I pretend to be. But I've been around and seen some things and have some thoughts. Love 'em or leave 'em. ~The Management

It's 12/12/12 - I'll check again at 11:59pm tonight but so far, most of us made it, right? (pours a little sumthin' sumthin' out for those who left too soon). Since we're still living - here are a few relationship truisms to take you through to the next apocalyptic countdown:

1. Yes, you are a prize but not for every damn body. Each of you individually is a prize... for someone. Maybe two or three someones but not for everybody.

2. Just because someone is a "good" man or woman, does not mean they are "good" for you.

3. Liking someone, lusting for someone and loving someone are not the same thing. Unless they come as a package deal for both parties in which case, when's the wedding?

4. If you've had three or more failed relationships in a row, you are the common denominator. (looks in mirror, sticks out tongue) #Arithmetic

5. Grown men and women in committed relationships cannot be stolen from one and other. Someone makes the conscious decision to leave.

6. The more you tell us how fabulous your life with so-and-so is, the less we believe you. My godparents have been married for 53 years. Every time I have asked how they are doing for the past 20 years, they respond "Baby we fine and we living." Okay? Keep your business off these inna-web-social-nets.

7. The idea that anybody is better than nobody is a blatant-assed lie.

8. The idea that marriage is a magical panacea for all that "ails" black women is an ignorant lie.

9. The idea that marriage and babies are the end-all, be-all for everyone to achieve happiness is a little naive.

10. The argument over $200 dates is pure foolishness. If you can't afford it, don't do it and for Baby Jesus' sake - quit bitching about it.

11. The idea that a man that you do not know, who does not know you (and whose relationship history is shady as all the trees in the Sierra Nevada put together) has the answers to your relationship woes is not only foolery, it is a HUSTLE. Quit buying into the hustle.

12. Ladies and Gentlemen, last but not least - a rhyme stolen from a Hallmark card: A better you makes a better two. Please work on fix your issues instead of looking for someone to fix them for you. That "you complete me" nonsense is a great movie line and no more. Complete yourself. 

Agree? Disagree? Gotta any to add to the list? Do share...

~Michele Grant from the Black 'n Bougie blog

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