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An alumnus of both Stanford University and Stanford Business School, I worked in Africa, Latin America, and Europe on assignments with Conservation I...
 
 
 
 

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Wake Up Call: 12 year-olds Charged With Attempt to Rape

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Recently, in Redwood City, CA, five teenage boys were charged with the intent to commit rape on two of their female classmates during a school field trip. Everyone involved was between the ages of 12 and 14. What are we communicating to our boys that makes any of them think that violence towards women is OK? The report says the boys took the "seventh-grade girls to a secluded area and assaulted them for five to eight minutes." What must they think about a girl's value to be able to inflict such violence upon them? We have to address rape and violence towards women in our culture head on, and acknowledge that our boys may be growing up with unhealthy values and attitudes towards women. 

school bus
Image by 04deveni via Flickr

When I first read the article, I was sitting in the hospital recovering from the birth of my son Hunter. And I suddenly became even more concerned with the media's impact on our boys....what will be required of me to ensure that my son doesn't become a victim to the media's negative messaging about women as other boys have become? Whether it's video games or music videos, the objectification of women across all platforms of media and advertising has led to a cultural acceptance of inequality and violence that clearly impacts our young children. How do I teach Hunter to believe in women when so much of what he will see everyday says it's OK not to?

I believe we can challenge the media's limiting portrayal of our women; we can empower our girls to believe in themselves despite all of this; and, we can teach our boys to respect everyone around them equally. Take the pledge at www.MissRepresentation.org to be the change you wish to see for women and girls. And tell us about the great work you are already doing on Facebook, or by signing on to Twitter and using #MissRep. 

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TanyaF 5 pts

I used to like Rihanna, but I was absolutely horrified to listen to her song S&M:
"Cause I may be bad, but I'm perfectly good at it
Sex in the air, I don't care, I love the smell of it
Sticks and stones may break my bones
But chains and whips excite me"

Katy Perry's E.T. lyrics:
"Kiss me, ki-ki-kiss me
Infect me with your love and
Fill me with your poison

Take me, ta-ta-take me
Wanna be a victim
Ready for abduction"

Kanye West Remix added new lyrics to E.T.:
"Tell me whats next? Alien sex.
Imma disrobe you
Then Imma probe you
See I abducted you
So I tell you what to do"

I used to listen to popular music with my 11-year-old son & 7-year-old daughter in the car. It is so catchy. The problem I have now are these horrible lyrics. These are not values I want them to absorb. And how can you BAN this with your kids without looking like a loon? All I can do now is just turn it off and put on storytellers.

I remember Tipper Gore in the mid 1980s with her campaign against popular music thinking she was wrong. As a mother, I don't think anymore.

So look at the music and there is a lot of objectification in there. Women are objectifying * themselves * saying "it's OK, I want this" and this is really unhealthy and not cool. It doesn't help the cause.

nellewrites 6 pts

I don't know what else to say to this. Teach boundaries. It is one thing to teach our children not to be confined by those artificial boxes society tries to throw them in, it is quite another to think that is license to blow past personal boundaries. There is a difference, and we need to make the lessons complete.

nellewrites ( http://nellewrites.net/ )

Quizzical mama 5 pts

and I am featuring the trailer for your film at my website, LOVE, SEX, AND FAMILY, which offers a holistic approach to human sexuality.

http://www.lovesexfamily.com/

@ Joon: I would say Miss Representation is about much more than pledges. In fact, considering the impact of the media and moving images, this film has significant potential. By pledging or liking the campaign, you spread the word about it.

@ Kikimojo: I believe Joon is referring to abstinence-only and creationist curriculum as opposed to comprehensive human sexuality education, which is what we need in our schools to empower young girls and boys to take ownership of their bodies and developing sexuality, and provide them with the tools to act responsibly and with integrity towards other.

E.g. this form of positive sex eduction: http://www.lovesexfamily.com/2011/03/positive-sex-...

as opposed to this mother's hysterical reaction to a children's sex education book: http://www.lovesexfamily.com/2011/05/childrens-sex...

kikimojo 5 pts

This disturbed me on so many levels, but I'm terribly distracted by the comment about funamentalists taking over schools...What?? And how is that even related to this?

Kiki

www.stillhatepickles.com ( http://www.stillhatepickles.com/ )

JOon Hancocky 5 pts

You had me up until the point where the article culminates in the signing of a pledge. Pledges, petitions, chain emails and voting haven't changed anything yet, not one thing. What we need is real action, something direct, something effective. Fundamentalists are taking over the public school system, taxpayers are footing the bill for creationist schools--we need something more than pledges. More info on public funding of private fundamentalist schools: http://vimeo.com/25606393

JennaHatfield 9 pts

Horrifying.

As a mom of two boys, this makes me shudder. Of course, I told my sons yesterday that if they ever act like (insertasininekidweranintoyesterday... as there were many), they would be losing all privileges. FOREVER. I may have stomped my foot. I don't know if that's enough to scare them forever, but I hope to have an open dialogue about what is and is not acceptable, including how the media plays into all of it.

Family Section Editor Jenna Hatfield (@FireMom ( http://twitter.com/FireMom )) blogs at Stop, Drop and Blog ( http://stopdropandblog.com ) and The Chronicles of Munchkin Land ( http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com ). She is a freelance writer and photographer.