What are the rules for the not-yet divorced?

I was at a party last week - nothing formal, just a simple Birthday Party filled with about 90% of people I did not know. When it came to "Are you married?"...I froze. Stumped. Crickets chirping. Really, what in the world is my problem? Yes, I am legally married, but we are seperated. How hard is it to say "No, I am seperated."?

My husband and I have literally been in "limbo" for over four years now. At first, I fought the end of our 19 year relationship, then he did for some reason, even though I don't understand why. As of last Summer, I gave it the ole 'Eff it', I'm going to be happy. Now, we are at complete agreement that the end is here and we need to make it official. (Though, this is a purely "business move" on his part, I don't care, I just want out)

I know this will not be a speedy process, so in the mean time..how do I answer people when asked if I am married? When do you start considering dating? (he's been with someone for a WHILE now). How do you bring that up tactfully? He works & lives about 200 miles away and comes over to see the kids about 2-3 days/week and stays with us. That is tolerable now, but how long is that going to work?

What are the answers to the other questions I have not even asked yet! HA, my head is spinning..spinning!

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