Long Summer Days Got You Down? Get a Child Whisperer!

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Summer is well underway. Before you know it we will be buying supplies, backpacks and super crunchy back-to-school jeans. The kids are over the thrill of being out for the summer. They aren't yet filled with dread for the impending first day of the new school year either. They are stuck somewhere in between. They are driving me mad.

I have managed to keep them entertained with outdoor play, trips to the grocery store (they love anywhere they can run amuck and embarrass me) and the neighborhood pool. As the days tick by however, they are getting harder and harder to impress. What is a mom to do with four bored kids? Get yourself some backup.

Our next door neighbors have kids. One day I turned around and their daughter was not so little anymore. She was 13. Where had the time gone? She mentioned that she would love to accompany us on one of our pool trips. It would be nice to have someone with me who didn't need me to blow up her floaties or apply her sunscreen.

So this morning, we were getting ready for the pool and I received a text from the person that shall from this point forward be referred to as... The Child Whisperer. I told her to meet us at the pool. This was possibly one of the smartest decisions that I have ever made in my life. No seriously. Freaking genius.

We were already at the pool when The Child Whisperer arrived. She walked in and put her things on a chair next to mine. I thought it would be lovely to sit and chat. I mean 13 is a huge deal. I remember being 13. Back then I was for all intents and purposes grown. No really I was. Just ask 13-year-old me.

Maybe I could even get some insight for when my oldest child reaches this milestone. The Child Whisperer is such a great kid that I know her parents have done something right. I was ready for my lesson in adolescent girl speak. But what actually happened was something out of the movies. A love story if you will. My kids noticed that The Child Whisperer had arrived. I can't say for sure but I think I saw puffy red hearts in all of their eyes.

I am sure if you have children you understand. It is constant Mama can I, Mama will you and Mama so and so did this. If you are spending time with your kids in any form or fashion, they are talking to you. A lot. Or asking you to do something. Or tattling. And if you are fortunate enough to have four children then you know that the talking just.never.stops. Except... when there is someone else. Someone who... takes their focus off of YOU.

Listen to me and listen to me good: Go get yourself a teenager!

Once they laid eyes on her, it became an all out war for her attention. They wanted HER to play with them. They wanted HER to watch them jump in the pool. They wanted HER to throw them around in the water. It was... well... I can't really come up with one word that is good enough to explain. It was everything that is right in the world. Major.

I watched my kids laugh and play with The Child Whisperer. I sat on my pool chair without being asked to judge any jumping contests. No one needed me to tighten any goggles. No one even asked me to get in the pool. It was... amazing. It wasn't just that I was getting an unexpected break. My children were so enamored with her that they weren't even arguing. They were taking turns at everything without being asked. Even... helping one another. Who were these children?

Reading a book at the pool
Credit: emmandevin.

After two-and-a-half hours of sunbathing, eating salty snacks and reading a good book (Did you just hear me? I said I was READING. A BOOK. AT THE POOL), it was time to head home for lunch. I hated for the peace and serenity to end but at least everyone had a good time. Including me. I broke the news that it was time to pack up. Just when I didn't think that I could love her anymore, The Child Whisperer said, "If you ever need my help at home, just let me know."

OMGAHHH. She was coming home with me. The Child Whisperer was going to work her magic there as well. When I got up this morning, no one prepared me that this would be the best day ever.

What is so great about my newly acquired teenager, you ask? (Yes,I know she is not really mine. Just shush) She is so good with my kids. She will play any game they want. They have played Monopoly Jr, hide and go seek and numerous rounds of rock, paper scissors. She even lets them win. Her patience is unwavering. She is so soft-spoken and pleasant. I understand why they adore her so.

She is the opposite of every worn-out, exhausted, run-ragged, tried and tested mother that I have ever known. She has not yet experienced the thrills and terrors of being a mother. She has many years before she has to learn all of those motherhood lessons, the hard way, just like we all have. She has never had her kid scream at her that he doesn't need to go potty, just as nuggets are falling out of his pants. She has not been to war like we have. She is still... untainted. Aww. I could just squeeze her.

She is amazing with my kids. They can't get enough of her. I know one day WAY WAY WAY down the road (I know she is reading this, so let's be clear. She should be at LEAST 30 before starting her family. Maybe 40.) after her own kids have pushed her to her breaking point, made her mad enough to chew nails, made her question her own sanity and made her heart feel the greatest love that she will ever know, I will be proud to say that my kids helped break her down. In! I meant break her in.

We love you The Child Whisperer. What are you doing tomorrow? :)



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