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The other day I was piloting our vehicle around while my four-year-old Hank pondered in the backseat, wondering aloud about different kinds of work he might like, and whether he could do various jobs when he grew up. For example, he wants to go through the swinging doors in Publix, the doors back by the lobsters, and I told him that only people who work at Publix go back there. He asked if he could possibly work at a grocery store one day, and I told him that he surely could if he wanted to -- that he could probably do whatever job he wants to do when he grows up.
He said, "Mom, why did you want to grow up and not do anything?"
I kid you not. That's what he said, just as sweetly and sincerely as can be. His honesty just floors me. FLOORS.
I thought, "Oh God, this is a great moment, thank you for this moment on Earth," and I said, "Is that what you think I do?" He said yes.
I said, "Well, first of all, I take care of you and Laura. And Daddy." He made no response.
So I launched into, "And I've also almost finished writing a kind of book that will let me teach college. Teach school." I tried to put the whole concept into preschooler terms. I think I used the word "dissertation." He listened politely.
Then he said, "That's not a real job."
I was so loving my life at this point. I asked him to please expand, what did he mean, pray tell?
He said, "A job is important." He put such particular emphasis on this word, only in his pronunciation it came out, "im-PWAWR-tant." And his tone was nearly exasperated, just so barely patient with my ignorance.
Of course I prompted him further. So what jobs does Hank regard as important? They are, in his exact words:
1. Working on electrical wires.
2. Making tires.
3. Fixing toys.
4. Putting dead people's bodies in the ground.
Website for one of the most important jobs in the world
I worked him over a little bit on the "mom job" and talked up my extensive experience in nurturing, administration, and domestic engineering. I asked him if that sounded important and finally talked him up to a "half important and half not important" rating.
I think I need better PR? Or I need to learn a trade.
Edited to add: My husband felt I should clarify that "this was not a conversation someone made up and put in a child's mouth to make a point." That these were, indeed, the actual, unprompted words that issued forth from his face. Let it be thus clarified.
Becky Woomer writes at Suburban Matron.
