What If You Can't Say No?

Hi Miranda,

Obviously I feel your post raises a meaty question (thus why I selected it for Career)... one question that came up for me that perhaps you can answer in the comments or a future post is:

Is it sustainable to stay in a job where family and job responsibilities are in conflict?

What I've noticed is so many women stress out and feel they can never say "no" and so they yes themselves for years... they feel conflict, the regret where they have to forgo family choices they would rather have made...and in the end, they get let go in the next round of layoffs. Not because they said no but simply because that is the way things roll in companies these days. And in the end we're all left with just what we see in the mirror and those we truly love...

What are your feelings on where these different scenarios come into play? I would love to hear more from you and others. Not only is it great conversation but also leads me to the trail of more great content ongoing that addresses working moms.

Paula Gregorowicz, The Intuitive Intelligence™ Coach
Download the Free Report: Your Own Uniqueness: The Path to Purpose, Prosperity, and Playfulness at http://www.intuitiveintelligencecoaching ( http://www.intuitiveintelligencecoaching.com )

I had a novel of a comment written in reply and it has been eaten by the internet. Drat.

My core values are family first, much like yours, and I'd venture to say that most women who feel this sort of conflict have the same values. But family first means being able to feed and provide for my family. Many women, and my mother was one of them and is the basis of my observation, are not always in the position to say "no" when their job and familial responsibilities are in conflict.

I don't think the situation you have here is the same as situations where women will lose their jobs and be replaced if they say no to their employers. Turning down an opportunity for optional professional development is the same as me foregoing another degree right now. I don't need another degree to be able to do my job even though another degree would help me professionally.

Thanks for reading and commenting!

Miranda writes the blog Not Super...Just Mom ( http://notsuper-justmom.com ).

It really is that simple. I made that choice. ( http://www.mommybyday.com/2010/11/making-worklife-... )