Lying About Birth: Yes, Kate Winslet Should Feel Ashamed

Syndicated

A friend recently brought to my attention, via Facebook, that Kate Winslet apparently just came out as having lied about having a natural childbirth when in fact she had an emergency c-section. She was embarrassed about having had the section. There seems to be a “c-sections are nothing to be embarrassed about” movement stirring up over this which I kind of think is ridiculous.

If you spend any time on a birth board you know there are an equal number of crazed natural birth fanatics as there are staunch c-section supporters. And by natural birth, I mean vaginal birth and not necessarily unmedicated birth. Each side has their extremists and then there are those of us normal people who reside in the middle.

You know, the people who know that yes...vaginal birth actually IS better for baby and mother and yes, c-sections do happen with much more frequency than is necessary due to the medical community being terrified of lawsuits should anything hypothetically go wrong during natural child birth. Because I guess lawsuits stemming from complications from c-section are less likely to occur. But on the other hand, medical necessity happens and c-sections are the solution. We middle grounders leave room for both kinds of birth in the world so long as no one is forced or tricked into unnecessary procedures.

Frankly I think Ms. Winslet should be embarrassed. But not about the c-section. I think she should be hiding in her bed with the covers pulled over her head because instead of taking the easiest road provided to her and just making a non-committal statement about how beautiful her child was and how they made it through the birth whole and healthy, she pretended to have had a natural birth.

Kate Winslet & Daughter Mia, © Globe Photos/ZUMAPRESS.com
Credit: © Globe Photos/ZUMAPRESS.com

Because having a natural birth elevates her status in the eyes of fans, I suppose.

You can’t argue she didn’t do this for the accolades that come with natural childbirth. Because yes, there are accolades. I’m sure everyone who patted her on the back or held her up as a standard now feels betrayed. And they should, just as she should feel completely moronic for having lied about it.

True story, the only kind of c-section that anyone should feel embarrassed about having had... is the kind where you didn’t actually need it. As in medically unnecessary, requested to have it simply because I didn’t want to have to go through pain or stretch out my lady bits. Because those people should be embarrassed. Yet more often than not, you see them bragging about it on birth boards. Why is that?

I’ve had two c-sections and am gearing up for my third. I had a scheduled c-section due to a Frank Breech baby that could not be turned, and I had an emergency c-section when my VBAC failed and my uterus ruptured. Did I feel embarrassed by the scheduled c-section? Not particularly -- nor was I particularly excited about it. I remember feeling deflated and not looking forward to the birth of my child. Who looks forward to major abdominal surgery that opens them up to the dangers of staph infections? And I had to mourn the loss of my dream to attempt an unmedicated water birth. But I had complete faith in my doctor’s judgment and my own research into vaginally delivering a Frank Breech baby scared the bejesus out of me.

Nor was I particularly embarrassed by the emergency c-section. Not that I had much choice in the matter, but if I hadn’t had it, my daughter would have died. And most likely so would I as I bled out into my own abdomen. What exactly is there to be embarrassed about when it comes to a life saving procedure? Would Kate Winslet be equally embarrassed if she drowned and a medic had to perform CPR? Ooh man, can’t let anyone know I had CPR. I magically rose from the dead and expunged the water from my lungs myself. I’m totally badass. Because an emergency c-section and CPR kind of amount to the same thing.

I’m not sure I agree with the thought that c-sections need to be stood up for in as much as there are way too many c-sections happening these days. But certainly one should not be made to feel shame for having had a c-section. You are not a failure for choosing what you have been told and believe is the safest option for you or your baby.

But yeah, if you have a medically necessary emergency procedure and proceed to lie about it “to save face” or look better in the eyes of anyone who wasn’t there to witness the terrifying horror that was your emergency c-section… you should be ashamed of yourself.

 

Audrey blogs at The Idea Girl where she talks about being a graphic designer and photographer who runs her own business from home so she can be with her growing family and have more time for crafty fun.

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