When Parents Bully

 Every kid gets made fun of at some point in their life, right? I know I did. But, now that I’m a Mom, I want to protect my kids from ever feeling the pain of rejection. Ever feeling sad about who they are. I want them to never feel like an outcast, or like they don’t matter. Bullying has been getting a lot of attention lately, and in my mind, rightfully so.

My children haven’t ever been bullied. Yet. But, I believe, that as cruel as the world is, it is bound to happen at some point. I can try doing everything in my power to love them, but sometimes that is not enough. And, in this cyber world we live in, it’s so easy to look at someone and judge them instead of love them. I have learned this as an adult. I have been judged for just being myself. As a 36-year-old mother of three, I’m still being judged and talked about. But, when we bring kids into the mix, it’s a whole different story. Because children should be off limits from our scrutiny.

I’m still thinking about the 12 year old who jumped from a water tower in September because of two “mean” girls. Twelve years old. Her Mom had moved her to a different school, she tried to be on top of things, she loved her daughter and many people were aware of the bullying, but it didn’t stop, until she made sure that she couldn’t be the target of their abuse anymore. By taking her own life. At age 12.

It’s so mind blowing to me. And, just when I think I’ve heard it all, I hear about a Facebook group that parents started to make fun of “ugly” kids. Some of which were handicapped. Some were babies. Yes, you heard me right. BABIES. They would steal pictures off people’s Facebook pages and then re-post them into their private group so that they could make fun of them. Calling toddlers and babies horrible, horrible things. For what? A laugh?

These are PARENTS saying these horrible things. And, we wonder why the bullying won’t stop. We wonder why “mean girls” still exist. It’s because mean parents exist.

It baffles me that a parent can say such horrible things about another child. Doesn’t that child deserve love as much as the next one? Have we forgotten that we are all God’s children. Equal. Deserving of Love. No matter what our weaknesses are inside or out. Can you not look into the face of your own child and see that they are innocent and perfect just the way they are? Well, isn’t someone else’s child just as important?

And, the thing is, I’ve heard things fall from the lips of my own mouth that I’m ashamed of. Mostly from my teenage years. No one is perfect. I get that. But, we should at least try to strive for perfection in front of our children in one area: Kindness.

Being kind means you don’t call anyone names to make yourself feel better.

Being kind means you try to love someone even when it’s difficult.

Being kind means you empathize with someone in their struggles.

Being kind means that you remind yourself that you are no better than someone else. Period.

Being kind means that you respect differences instead of judging others for them.

Being kind means that you reach out to someone when it is uncomfortable.

Being kind means that you are just plain nice.

Have we forgotten such simple principles? Let me tell you, your child is always watching you. You call someone fat…they hear it. You judge someone’s appearance one day….they take note. You laugh at the expense of someone else…they see it. You obsess over a brand name and give importance to it…..they want it.

To those parents that created the online FB group to make fun of other children: Shame. On. You. Your kids are watching. Maybe they won’t see it today, but it’s out there. Newsflash: YOU ARE THE PROBLEM.



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