When You Give a Mom a Moment

If you give a mom a moment, she is probably going to go sit on the couch.

On her way to the couch she will probably step on a lego.

As she doubles to the floor to check the damage on the bottom of her foot, she will probably notice the large dust bunnies that have accumulated under the couch.

She will get a mop and clean the floors.

When she is done cleaning the floors she will need a drink.

When she opens the fridge she will  suddenly get hungry and remember that she never ate lunch. Or breakfast. Only a handful of goldfish all day long.

So she will make a sandwich. Most likely peanut butter and jelly.

When her kids smell the peanut butter they will come flocking and want a sandwich too.

After cleaning up from lunch-part-II, she will realize that she never defrosted anything for dinner.

She will haul all of the kids in the car and head to the grocery store to buy chicken.

A cart full of groceries, 3 tantrums, and 3 unnecessary boxes of fruit snacks later, she will drive home.

On the way home she will remember that she has to stop at the bank.

The kids will instantly remember that the bank = lollipop-drive-thru and make lots of noise so the teller know there are, in fact, kids in the car.

The kids will eat their lollipops despite mom’s best efforts to save them for after dinner.

She will unpack the groceries and start to make dinner.

When dinner is served the kids will  eat two bites and no longer be hungry because of the lollipop that spoiled their appetite.

Instead the kids will want to play outside.

As the kids are riding bikes in the driveway, mom will notice that the neighbors have their trash cans out and remember that tomorrow is trash day. She will pull her cans to the end of the driveway, and then immediately want to wash her hands because trash cans (especially hers) are disgusting.

She will usher the kids inside and wash her hands. As she is washing her hands she will remember the wash! The wash that she started this morning and never put in the dryer.

She will open the washer and waft the mildewy smell and have to rewash the load. When she is leaving the laundry room, she will pass the kids’ rooms and notice their unkempt beds which will remind her about their sheets! When was the last time she washed their sheets????

She will likely not be able to recall this ancient event and immediately begin stripping the beds.

After she has climbed to the top bunk and bumped her head on the ceiling at least three times she will discover that she suddenly  has a headache.

She will go to the medicine cabinet to get some Advil and will see her child’s allergy medicine that she needs to give him. She will give him his allergy medicine and….

he’ll probably want to wash it down with a glass of water.

When she opens the cabinet to get a glass, she will see that it’s empty. She will look in the dishwasher and realize that she needs to unload it.

By the time she unloads the dishwasher, she will notice that her son is getting drowsy from the allergy medicine and will decide that it’s time for bed.

After she gets their pjs on, brushes their teeth and reads them a story, she will remember the sheets!

She will frantically search for the second set of blasted sheets, remake the beds, bump her head a few more times on the ceiling and may even curse a few times.

Once the kids are tucked in bed she will realize that she, herself, is tired too. Surprise, surprise.

But she will not want to go to bed yet because she will want some “me time”.

She will pour a glass of wine and head to the couch for a second stab at that “moment”.

And chances are, on the way to the couch, she will likely step on a lego…..

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