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We have a lot on our minds. We want information fast. If we perform a search that happens to include the words “single” and “woman,” we want relevant results, not a bunch of dating sites. We can't change what’s out there, but there are a few places where single women can find helpful information.
Single Edition – “the first lifestyle destination for unmarried individuals that will deliver daily value to help them manage their everyday lives.” They tackle questions such as, Do I need to have a will if I’m single?
Quirkyalone – a site that describes itself as “a community of independent thought on singledom, life, and love.”
GenPink – a site for twenty-something women, “balancing family and work, technology, entertainment, and exploration of new ideas.”
What are single women writing about? Here are some of the things on our mind:
1) What if something unexpected happens when I’m alone?
Kat got her finger stuck in a fireplace grate (luckily, she was able to free herself after several minutes of maneuvering), which caused her to think about how things can happen as a single women when nobody else is around. She called this type of alone the “’I'm going to die and no one's going to miss me until it's too late’ kind of alone.”
[Getting my finger stuck] was a reminder of the realities of living alone, and, actually, of life itself. You are born alone, and you die alone. Better fill up the in-between time with people who'll miss you enough to check in on you.
2) How do I deal with stress?
Mayan gives 10 reasons why singles should celebrate their singlehood, and #8 has to do with the quality of our friendships.
Reason #8: You have better friendships. Significant others are a wonderful thing, no doubt, but friends count, too. And on that front, one study found that, when women get married and have children, they spend much less time with their friends—less than five hours a week, down from 14 hours. Singles, however, often have the greatest sense of friendship and community—which can actually decrease stress levels, according to researchers at UCLA.
Here are 101 Ways to Fight the Stress Out of Your Life.
And don’t forget – toxic marriages can cause stress, too.
3) I feel like a third wheel when I go out with a couple.
I’ve gone out with couples where I was the only single person, and I’ve also had more than a few couples as roommates. It’s not an ideal situation.
Ginger has a Third Wheel Manifesto.
[O]nce you start dating it's as if your new personality arrived from a parallel universe. It's bizarre; you seem to have lost brain cells. Apparently you all possess dictionaries that only supply pet names like Boo Bear, Honey Love, Noodle, Cupcake, Pumpkin and Love Muffin.
I mean, are those names or menu items? Are you dating them or eating them? Make up your mind.
Ever notice that when you engage us in conversation using these names that we supply a look of confusion and proceed to ask you "whom are you referring to?" Then you follow up by saying, "you know who I'm talking about, my boo."
Now listen up, because you need to know this. We want you to know this. Yes, we do know whom you're speaking. But our rulebook on such matters clearly state…in order to preserve ones dignity a reply of no is required, a firm "no, I don't know who you're talking about".
This allows us to retain some self-respect. This is not story time; you are not reading to children. Please, spare us and use their real names.
4) I have less in common with my friend now that she’s married and/or has a child.
One Pale Fire talks about her predicament.
Then I was just thinking I don't spend enough time hanging with Duffy and Susan and Simone... I wonder why I don't do that, they are nicer to be with then a few other people I can think of. I guess the married with children thing is hard for a single sometimes just because there is less in common to share. It's not that I think they are really boring or anything I just don't have much to say about property tax and what not.
5) How do I handle being a part of the singles scene?
KC went to a church-sponsored “Christmas dinner activity for single people,” but the men in attendance were less than ideal.
[The
