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If you read enough blogs, you already know the single female blogger is a hard person to define. When you picture her, is she someone who doesn't have a boyfriend, isn't married, and falls between the ages of 20-29? Sure, some of them are.
But maybe, if you're like me, your definition is more broad than that. Because who is single? Anyone who isn't currently married? I tend to think of women as single up until the time they get hitched (you have to check that "single" box when you're filling out surveys and tax forms, right?). But what about women who are in committed, long-term relationships with no thought of marriage? Do they consider themselves single? I doubt it.
Then you have those women formerly known as single female bloggers. As in, they've been blogging as a single person and then they get married -- but they still retain the same audience, and they still read the same blogs as before. Maybe they're able to relate to their single blog-friends because they're still childless? But then, what about the single mothers -- divorced or never married? They're technicaly "single," too, right?
This is an example of how some groups are just hard to pin down, and also how one group can include so many different types of people who all define themselves in the same way, with the same title. And, wow, do those single female bloggers talk about a variety of subjects.
I'm going to give you examples of just how varied they really are. I found these people through various groups on the NaBloPoMo site (like Bloggin' Singles); the BlogHer singles blog list; Twenty Something Bloggers; and some are posts from women I've already been reading on a regular basis. (The descriptions of the ladies, where available, either came from the blogger's sidebar, their "About" page, or their NaBloPoMo profile description.)
This is what single female bloggers are writing about:
They don't think you should live your life, or base your social calendar, on finding a man.
Katie is "a 20-something girl going about life, love and the pursuit of happiness in the best way I know how."
Sometimes I think that, as a single woman, people assume that we all operate this way, filling our social calendars based on the possibility of meeting a man. To the single gals out there, how many times have you felt like someone was dangling the potential of single guys in front of you, expecting you to jump all over it faster than a cat on one of those catnip-filled mouse-on-a-string toys?
Don't get me wrong, I know I'm not going to meet anyone sitting on my couch alone or hanging out with the same people I always do. I know I need to put myself out there in order to expand my "network," so to speak, and increase my chances of avoiding Spinsterville. But I think there's a fine line between making a concerted effort to "get out there" and letting the need to find a guy dictate your life.
They give advice -- such as "get married in your 20s and then stick it out," because it's not as much fun to date in your 30s.
Lisa lives in Washington, DC:
By their 30s, people have gone through bad divorces. They've been cheated on or had affairs. They're jaded. Cautious. Angry. Bitter. You name it. They've lived through too many hurtful situations, have made mistakes they don't want to repeat, are scared to commit, scared to get hurt, scared to trust.
So, seriously. There are plenty of perfectly reasonable single people around in their 20s. Pick one you like and marry them. And stick it out. Even if you loathe the person sometimes, stick it out. Unless you loathe them all the time, and then I imagine it's pretty much impossible.
They move to new cities (in this case, DC to NYC).
LJ describes herself as: "aspiring writer, tori amos junkie, flowers, wwf music, full email inbox, swing dancing, poetry, autumn, photography, frou frou coffee drinks, back rubs, karaoke queen, iced tea, too many interests... too little time, chocoholic, flutist, acquiring new passport stamps, overpriced designer jeans, and shoes... way too many shoes."
The funny thing is so many people have this misconception that NYC is impersonal. That you get lost in the shuffle and no one knows your name. No one realizes when you come and go. You're just
