I just wish that the question above was merely rhetorical, but it is not. I’ve been asking it to myself, like, almost every day, really. And all I can do is tracing back who’s fault in the family---my dad, my mom, or others. Do you think being an introvert has something to do with genetics?

Speaking of the word introvert, I don’t actually like labeling myself that way (or with any other label), but the said word makes myself pretty easy to describe a part of myself. Yes, I am an introvert. But if I stick with Wikipedia’s explanation, then I’m both introverted and shy. This following definition is so very me!

Introversion is “the state of or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one’s own mental life”. Introverts tend to be low-key, deliberate, and relatively less engaged in social situations. They often take pleasure in solitary activities such as reading, writing, drawing, watching movies, and using computers. The archetypal artist, writer, sculptor, composer and inventor are all highly introverted. An introverted person is likely to enjoy time spent alone and find less reward in time spent with large groups of people (although they tend to enjoy interactions with close friends). They prefer to concentrate on a single activity at a time and like to observe situations before they participate.

Introversion is not the same as shyness. Introverts choose solitary over social activities by preference, whereas shy people avoid social encounters out of fear.

An introvert is energized when alone. Introverts tend to “fade” when with people and can easily become overstimulated with too many others around. Introverts tend to think before speaking.

Although Wikipedia sees introverts not as a ‘bad’ thing, most people do, I guess. Here’s an article (via Alaskan Girl) which proves that:

With their endless appetite for talk and attention, extroverts also dominate social life, so they tend to set expectations. In our extrovertist society, being outgoing is considered normal and therefore desirable, a mark of happiness, confidence, leadership. Extroverts are seen as bighearted, vibrant, warm, empathic. "People person" is a compliment. Introverts are described with words like "guarded," "loner," "reserved," "taciturn," "self-contained," "private"—narrow, ungenerous words, words that suggest emotional parsimony and smallness of personality. Female introverts, I suspect, must suffer especially. In certain circles, particularly in the Midwest, a man can still sometimes get away with being what they used to call a strong and silent type; introverted women, lacking that alternative, are even more likely than men to be perceived as timid, withdrawn, haughty.

[…]

That...so sums up the kind of extrovert hegemony that can make life miserable. I think it's particularly hard for girls and women. "You'd be so much more popular if you'd talk more." It seems to me that the world would be a much better place, and that people would be much more rightly popular, if they talked less. Because so little of what most people say is actually worth hearing.

If you’re an introvert yourself and have been posing the very same question without really comprehending the answer, here are the possibilities I’ve compiled of why you become BOTH an introvert and a shy person:

1. You are half your young-dad and half your young-mom (my dad is more
   introverted than my mom, but I’m much more introverted than my dad
   now)---I’m not talking about genetics, but talking about how some of
   your parents’ traits can be yours instead.
2. The way your parents and other close people around you treated you ever
   since childhood affect it (did they mostly give positive or negative
   comments about you and what you did? Did they always demand you to be
   number one, no matter what? Did they always expect you to be ‘fun’?).
3. You take what the majority of media write and say, too seriously.
4. You’ve been accustomed to be with the same kind of people, you feel
   that with them (or still act the way they do) is where you get the
   ‘safest zone’.

The four possibilities above seem kind of negative, don’t you think? As hard as it is sometimes to be both introverted and timid, I’m trying to keep in mind my very own therapy: forget about what your parents did in your childhood, forget about those media, forget about those outgoing people, it may likely that you become what you are now as a genuine natural process. Do remember, being an introvert and a shy person isn’t a crime or even a sin.

I don’t assume that as denial, as I am not trying to deny anything. I’m just struggling to stop asking the "why" and to avoid thinking so negative almost every time.

(this is cross-posted here)