Why do I Watch this Crap? Ode to The Bachelor
Okay, as much as I hate to admit this, once again I've been sucked in to watching "The Bachelor".
Sean Lowe-Bachelor #864
- It’s a waste of time. (Oh, all the other things I could be doing during this time slot!)
- I hate that they keep recycling contestants who didn’t “find love” the first time around. (Yeah, Brad, Emily, Kasie B and whoever else, I'm talking to you!)
- I hate that the girls act like horny, desperate, man-crazed, idiots with no class. (Don't they care that their parents are going to watch the show?)
- I hate that the contestants must be screened by some sexist pig. (Most real-life girls don't look like that in bikinis, guys!)
- I hate when the girls say, "Oh, so-and-so took me on an amazing date today!" (No. He. Didn't. In real life you will never, ever be picked up in a helicopter.)
- One out of five adults has an STD. (STAY OUT OF THE HOT TUB!)
But then the Monday night premiere roles around and I say, “I’m just going to watch the ladies get out of the limo. I want to see their dresses and watch how many crazies there are!” (Good Lord, there are always so many!) Then, before I even realize it, two hours of my life is gone and I can’t wait for the following Monday night to roll around so I can watch the drama unfold!
Will the real Ben Flajnik please stand up?
Not the best way to land a man, ladies.