Why I'm Still Sarcastically Single: Steak

Recently, the guy I’m dating asked me whether I’d ever mention him in my blog.  This got me thinking about dating and why I’m still dating at my age and why this man would choose to date me over a woman with bigger breasts and a smaller waist.

If you’re like me, you probably get into a relationship hoping that it would (should) last a lifetime.  But unfortunately for some of us, it just ends up FEELING like a lifetime.

Ladies, how many times have you gotten together with your girlfriends and one of you has said, “I can’t believe I didn’t break up with Dopey / Sneezy / Sleepy / Mopey / Gropey sooner! That was just too much drama!”

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But then, in less than three months this same woman is enamored with “Ricardo”.  And the “C” in his name is pronounced like an “S”, because he’s a Rebel with a capital “R”.

RiSardo collects scrap metal, “Penthouse” magazines, pen caps and empty Lean Cuisine boxes and turn them into lawn sculptures, except he hasn’t quite gotten the inspiration for his first sculpture yet, as he finds your friend to be too “clingy” and is blocking his creative process.

You may laugh, but how many of us have been there?  I know I have.

Now, older and less desperate, I find it amusing to still be single, because I’m discovering this whole new realm of “eligible” men – older married men, who are completely obsessed with taking me to expensive steakhouses.

I am a creature of habit.  Every time I visit Hong Kong, before taking the ferry back to China, I try to make a pit stop at the Dan Ryan’s in the Harbor City Center and sit at the bar.  Although I’ve never visited a Dan Ryan’s in the States, the heavy-wood,deep, upholstered booths and Chicagoan, art deco decor are comforting to me when I’m abroad.  I also have my equivalent of comfort food there – a glass of California white and a salad, or a big burger with everything on it and fries.

One time while sitting at the bar, an American from either Alabama or Atlanta – it was a city or state that began and ended with an “A” – struck up a conversation with me.  He said he traveled every other week between China and his home in the US, where his wife was waiting for him.  But they’d been married for decades and really weren’t “MARRIED married” anymore, but just “married”.

He’d met all these “girls” in China, and they were cute – and he likes Chinese woman, because they’re so feminine and delicate – but none of them spoke English as well as I.  It was so refreshing for him to talk to someone who “got” him the way I did…which his wife obviously could never do.

Since I had a lot of time before my ferry, I bantered with him for a while till he grandly asked whether I’d ever been to Morton’s Steakhouse.

Morton’s Steakhouse is a high-end American chain with pretty expensive steaks.  I’d actually been to the Morton’s at the Sheraton in Hong Kong a number of years ago, and it cost about US$370.00 for two people.

At that time I didn’t “put out”- a fact that my dining companion reminded me of (again), when I asked him how much he spent on the meal for the purpose of this post.  (Get over it, Steve.  I’ll get you something nice for X’mas.)

I told Atlanta/Alabama that I had, in fact, been to Morton’s and, although the steaks are very good quality, I couldn’t justify paying so much for a piece of meat that’s just going to end up in the sewer.

“Oh… but man!  They have good steaks.  Boy, do they EVER have good steaks!” declared Atlanta/Alabama.  “You can’t tell me their Filet Mignon doesn’t just make your mouth water… it is cooked to per-fec-tion.  How do you like your steaks done?  I’ll bet you like your steaks bloody and with lots of juice, huh?  You look like that kinda crazy gal!”

“Uhhhh….well…noooooo, I actually prefer MEDIUM rare….”

“Well now that’s because you’ve not had a good piece of steak done RARE.  Once you do I know you’ll never want to go back.  That tender, succulent meat just melts in your mouth when it’s that rare.  You just want to suck all the juices from your plate up….”

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