WHY MEN (or Women) CHEAT.....

WHY DO MEN (OR WOMEN) CHEAT.......?That is a big question that could be debated over for days, weeks, years, and a lifetime.....I simply don't have one clear cut answer....or solution....I can simply say this.....When someone cheats it is almost always if not always LYING....How can one cheat if they are not lying....?Would cheating still be cheating if everyone was telling the truth and everyone was OK with it......?That would be more of an open relationship which is totally another subject or another blog for another time....which in my opinion is not much of a committed relationship at all.....Anyhow...Why do Men Cheat?

I believe those who are in committed relationships who cheat do so out of their own desire to do so....First, they have to Justify in their mind why they are cheating. Anything can be justified when we want to.....A wrong can be made a "right" simply through justification.....We find support and reasons for justifying anything.....That is how it is done....

Once a man or woman has justified why they are doing what they are doing they become open to it......And generally the opportunity will surface at some point.......That is usually when the real lying and deceit comes in....Once this happens the foundation to the relationship usually begins to crumble whether the non-cheating spouse knows about the cheating or not....Something changes in the relationship....that something called Trust.....

Trust is an essential ingredient for any long lasting successful relationship.....Sure relationships can "survive" without it.....but it cannot THRIVE without it....Trust is an essential ingredient for great relationships of anykind....not just romantic ones.....

So back to "why men (or women) cheat?"....First, it is rarely if ever about the person being cheated on....It is about the desire to have  a relationship that is seperate from the person they are commited to.....For some it is the desire for more intimacy, for others it is simply about the thrill of it all.....Some it is simply an addiction of sorts....whereas for others it simply is a lack of committment to the committed relationship......There are simply unlimited reasons why a person cheats.....

Cheating is cheating no matter how you look at it.....Unless it is agreed on by all parties and is out in the open it is likely to be some form of lying and lying in my opionion is a form of cheating.....and broken trust....

It takes a long time to build trust.....and only a moment to destroy it....Anyone thinking of an affair needs to think long and hard....The ramifications of cheating tends to have a lifetime affect upon the relationship cheated upon......Sure, relationships can be healed over time and even made into something better than it originally was....but once cheating has taken place it no longer can go back to exactly the way it was before....that innocence of a committed relationship.....

Why Men (or women) Cheat can't be totally embraced or discussed in one blog, one book, one TV show, or one anything....It is a complicated situation or topic.....one where the people involved need  a lot more than a paragraph of quick solutons.....Whether one has cheated or been cheated on it is simply a heart wrenching time.....a time where great support is needed to help one navigate through  to make the very best decisions for all involved.....Every situation is differnt and in turn every solution is different.....

And for those who are sincere and  deserve it....there is still that thing called "Forgiveness...." One of the keys to every successful relatonship.....

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