Why Was I in Such a Hurry?
By beccadorr on July 29, 2014
How many of you, upon graduating high school, expected to graduate college at 22, immediately marry your boyfriend of 2+ years, and have your first of 2-3 kids before you turned 24?
Life sure doesn’t turn out how you expect it to, does it? I did not graduate college. I didn’t get married until I was 26, and he wasn’t my high school sweetheart and we didn’t meet in college. I’m 27 now, and there are still no children to speak of.
It awes me to think of the hurdles I’ve jumped just to get here. Just to get to this place that was never my “goal”. I’ve battled depression, severe anxiety, lost loved ones, broken friendships, broken hearts, and a body that tried so hard to quit.
But I’m happy.
Would I be happy if I’d gotten everything I wanted? If my life had been simple, married to my high school sweetheart, with a decent job and at least two children by now?
But I might not have appreciated what I had. I might not have cherished my husband quite as much, because I wouldn’t know what it was like to lose someone. I might have taken my body for granted, because I wouldn’t know what it was like to have a close call. I might not have known who my real friends were, because they never would have had the opportunity to show me. I might have even resented having children so young, because I would have wondered what I could have done without them. I have no doubt I would have loved them, but I also am positive that question would have lingered.
I wouldn’t say I took my time; I would say that things just didn’t happen the way I expected. But they turned out better than I could have even imagined.
Why was I in such a hurry?
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