Women disrespecting Women
There is something that feels inherently wrong when I witness women disrespecting other women but it happens. We see it played on-screen, we read it online, we may have participated and have likely seen it in front of us. By all these accounts it may appear that kinship amongst women is eroding but is it really? or Are we still under the surface seeking support and recognition from each other?
Women can be extremely hard on one another especially when they find pain points and start poking. It is not to say that men don't disrespect each other but they tend to want to physically duke it out rather than verbally puke it out in order settle a score. Some women (and men) like to gain favour with others by cutting down people who can't defend themselves. I'm sure we can all find examples of this type of immaturity within our social circle. Let me give you an example:
It was only a short time ago when I listened to a callous comment come from a woman about another friend's wife. She rattled off some statements that concluded with an assumption that her male friend is "hen-pecked by his wife" because he wasn't sure he could attend an upcoming party. No doubt he probably made it sound like his potential absence was his wife's fault but either way this woman felt she would render an opinion.
His wife is often described as a warm person, "salt of the earth" type of woman, who works both in the home raising two young children and outside of the home at a part-time job. She did not deserve to be described as a person who "pecks" her husband and I can assure you this other woman would never have had the nerve to say that to her face. I debated on calling this woman out on her judgement but I bit my tongue instead. (I've regretted that decision ever since) As it turned out he attended that party while his wife stayed home due to a lack of childcare options.
I've witnessed a few behaviours which caused me to consider how we, women, act towards each other. I jokingly wonder if our nurturing or compassionate traits are being genetically altered. The extreme attitudes that are depicted today likely come down to a screw up in nature or nurture, which one do you want to place your bet on? It's entirely possible that it was always survival over camaraderie when it came to women's relationships but I get the feeling we are crossing more boundaries than our foremothers.
If we ever had a code of ethics amongst women there appears to be a need for a reintroduction. If we never had any, then maybe we should establish some like a gang or a set of "thou shalts" like religious books -- something that keeps us understanding the definition of sisterhood. I say this with a partial smirk on my face as I know "thou shalts" haven't been respected by most followers of religious text and I'm not sure creating or breaking gang-like codes of ethics necessarily turned out well for all involved. I just wish there was some way to change the great female divide that appears to be widening with every generation.
They say women hormonally are becoming more like men... now that scares me. They say women are just exercising their right to be whatever they want to be....even if that means disrespecting self and others. There are a lot of theories as to why we see an emergence of women on women violence...none of which helps me to understand how to stop it.
Meanwhile, men can easily stand back and chuckle at the antics of women who seem hell-bent on dishonoring their own gender. They can even on some level admire a woman who "gives it as good as she gets it" as it makes her one of the boys, not a girl. Because, why would she want to be a girl?
Have we (women) become colder towards each other? Are we creating more conflict and less enriching alliances?
Is it more appealing to highlight what divides us than what has bound and sustained us for centuries?