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Rita Arens authors Surrender, Dorothy and Surrender, Dorothy: Reviews. She is BlogHer.com's senior editor.  Her parenting anthology and BlogHer'...
 
 
 
 

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Would You Sell Your Wedding Dress?

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On my ten-year wedding anniversary this summer, I put on my wedding dress and took some pictures and posted them on my blog in a letter apologizing to my husband for not having actually bought him a gift. Aren't I nice?

wedding dress

Credit Image: Andrew Morrell Photography on Flickr


I don't think I'd ever sell my wedding dress, even if it was actually worth something. According to Josie Daga of www.preownedweddingdresses.com, lots of people do. And they claim they're being altruistic! They just want to share! According to their recent survey:

  • 42% said sharing the dress is the biggest motivator to selling -- even more than the money

  • 26% do say money is their biggest motivator to selling

  • 23% of respondents changed their mind and bought a different dress (sometimes more than once!)

  • 36% of yet-to-be brides said they would go over budget if they found a dress they couldn’t live without

  • 58% of brides planned to sell their gown before they even wore it

Am I alone in calling bull caca on these brides? Would you really sell your wedding dress for any reason other than money or wanting to forget the whole experience? What do you think?

Rita Arens authors Surrender Dorothy and is the editor of Sleep is for the Weak. She is BlogHer's assignment and syndication editor.

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threehautemamas 5 pts

Let me preface by saying I am divorced and had no problem getting rid of my gown;)

Ellya Brill 5 pts

Mine is for sale right now. I bought a vintage one for USD 75.00 6 years ago. This is my second marriage. Although it is very beautiful; the truth is I can no longer fit in that dress otherwise I would keep it and wear it again.

Leighbra 15 pts

My mom made my wedding dress. I would not sell it. I may repurpose the fabric into a useful keepsake, but I wouldn't sell it.My SIL bought a very expensive dress (5 figures) & had to sign a contract that she would not sell her dress for a certain number of years, maybe 10?

Rita Arens 275 pts

Leighbra That's crazy -- why?

mayaelena1212 5 pts

Upon getting engaged and finding "the dress" after going to three bridal gown shops and trying on dozens of dresses, I perceived myself having an attachment to it and cherishing it always. 10 1/2 years later, I am just not feeling it. That dress wasn't my marriage, I just wore it for a few hours as I entered the marriage through a ceremony. Now my gorgeous veil with pearls is another matter.....:)

Rita Arens 275 pts

mayaelena1212 It's funny what we think we will get attached to and then what we actually do, isn't it?

Jessica Newfer 5 pts

I probably would not sell my wedding dress (if I had one), because it would be just a regular, modest dress, not a traditional, fancy white one that costs $3,000.

Rita Arens 275 pts

What color if not white? Jessica Newfer

Kaity Best 5 pts

Absolutely!

To me the dress isn't what makes your wedding day significant. Your marriage is what makes your day significant. There was no way I could justify dropping hundreds of dollars on a dress I would wear once. It just seemed so extravagant and unnecessary. I'm buying my dress off of RecycledBride.com! :)

Rita Arens 275 pts

Hope you find what you're looking for! Kaity Best

ItsFitting 8 pts

I love my dress. I've thought about selling it, but really... no amount of money that I get for it would really make it worthwhile (unless someone wants to make me an offer ;-)) I hope that if my second is a girl I can keep it for her. If not, eh... I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. But i agree with Lori, the dress does not represent my marriage... just the day that I wore it.

Rita Arens 275 pts

Agreed it doesn't represent the marriage. But they are sort inherently tied together. ItsFitting

Lori@createyourcalm. 6 pts

I would sell my dress. It represents one of the happiest days of my life - and I have the pictures to prove it. The dress is amazing and beautiful. It was absolutely perfect for our day - but it does not represent my marriage. My marriage is amazing and beautiful - everyday - and I don't need pictures or a dress to prove it. The dress is not the marriage. I would love for someone else to be able to wear it and begin their life with their best friend in it - just as i did.

Rita Arens 275 pts

I like that concept -- that it represents the day. Lori@createyourcalm.

Kellyand3kids 7 pts

Honestly, I don't think I could give my '90's gawdy, puffy, over beaded, pin tucked, choker neck line of a dress, away! I have even questioned myself as to why I keep it in my possession, I don't think my girls will want any part of it. However, the sentimental voice in my head hopes that it can be incorporated in some way, even if it is reconstructed into the ring pillow.

Rita Arens 275 pts

I can totally see that dress in my head. Kellyand3kids

Stephanie Kush 5 pts

My mom cut apart her wedding dress to incorporate it into mine, which she was making. It's one of a kind. It's also 8 sizes too big now. My plan is to have a "trash the dress" photo shoot with it. I'll pull off the parts that were from my mom's dress, some cool parts from mine and do something with them. I'll just binder clip up my back and destroy it. I'm thinking a paint ball match with my husband.

Rita Arens 275 pts

Paintball, now that's an interesting way to be done with it!

tie 5 pts

if only i have, i wouldn't sell it. except, bcs of many things, finally, i hate the man who become my husband. i would give that dress to anyone, as long i don't haveto see it anymore. but if my financial condition very crisis, say i must pay my children study cost n their dad doesn't give the money, it isbetter i sell the dress for pay study cost

Rita Arens 275 pts

tie I think in your case, selling it sounds like a good idea.

BLDahl@msn.com 5 pts

My girls said too old fashioned!! When they married I CUT THE DRESS apart, made a dance "money Bag", decorated the flower girls baskets, created the "mailbox" card holder, changing the initials for each wedding and saving it for my sons wedding,

embellished the ink pen holders for the guest book, and I still have some left over to help accentuate the first grandbabies bassinet!! GREAT use of something old!!

Rita Arens 275 pts

BLDahl@msn.com Wow -- I'm so impressed!

Jane Byers Goodwin 47 pts

I wore my sister's dress, and I didn't even try it on until the night before. I returned it to her a few hours after the ceremony. The frippery of the wedding meant nothing to me; it was the marriage that was important, not the wedding.

I do have pictures, but I have to look twice to see if it's me or my sister. I find this hilarious and so does she. My favorite picture is of my mom, angrily ironing the dress, as I wasn't going to bother with that, either. I also forgot to buy shoes, so I wore brown sandals.

You really don't want to get me started on wedding expense these days. There are so many more important places to put big money than on a woman's back and in a party room.

For me, sentiment means people, not things.

Rita Arens 275 pts

Jane Byers Goodwin Jane, after getting to know you here on BlogHer, I'm not surprised in the least at this comment. It's what I like about you. :)

anniegirl1138 5 pts

I donated the first one to an organization that helped girls and women who needed formal attire for events but couldn't afford it.The second one is still hanging in the closet and I would like to Freecycle it or something but the wee daughter has designs on it for the moment. My mother still has her dress - 55 years after the fact. Not one of her daughters wore it - mostly b/c she was a freakishly thin at 24.

Rita Arens 275 pts

anniegirl1138 Which organization? Is it national?

KarenLynnn 2225 pts

I donated mine to Goodwill. I married the man, the dress didn't matter (but it was beautiful and we have pictures)

Rita Arens 275 pts

KarenLynnn That was nice of you!

Kerry B 7 pts

NO WAY! I was married over 10 years ago and although my dress isn't considered fashionable these days I still adore it. I don't expect my daughters to wear it but I LOVE LOVE LOVE to look at it and remember what a wonderful day that was. Maybe my girls will want it for something or even a part of it.

Rita Arens 275 pts

Kerry B This comment made me happy.

themhalf 10 pts

I would totally sell my dress, if I could get off my duff enough to get it cleaned and post pretty pictures of it. I'm not having children and I know someone out there would love it more than just languishing in the back of my closet. I tried it on around our 10th wedding anniversary and while I can get it on, I can't zip it. Not even close. Drat.

Rita Arens 275 pts

themhalf How much would you ask for it? Half what you paid? I wonder how you even figure out pricing for something like that.

sharongreenthal 103 pts

My wedding dress has been in my garage for 22 years, packed in a special box waiting for....what? There's no way my daughter will wear my straight-out-of -the-eighties creation. I would sell it in a heartbeat, but I doubt anyone would want it!

Rita Arens 275 pts

sharongreenthal I didn't get mine packed in the special box after my mom took hers out of the special box so I could try it on one time and it was totally mangled. I think the special box ate it.

sharongreenthal 103 pts

Rita Arens I have a feeling my dress looks like a pile of rags at this point!

lindsayblogs 12 pts

I wore the dress my mother wore when she married my dad (they were divorced when I was 2, but she saved the dress). After my own divorce, I burned that sucker in a burn barrel out back (can you tell I'm a country bumpkin?). It felt SO good.

Rita Arens 275 pts

lindsayblogs That sounds like a good idea to me. I don't have a burn barrel at my house, but I had one growing up in Iowa. It is very satisfying to burn things. ha!

Sofia Michaels 12 pts

I gave my wedding dress to a good friend less than a year after I was married. I figured I had pictures, I'll never wear it again and the chance of someone in my family wanting it were slim.

Instead I kept the train from my wedding dress and had a christening gown and christening suit made out of it and our 2 daughters and a son wore then. The collar on my son's suit was made from the pocket square from my husbsnd's tux.

Rita Arens 275 pts

Sofia Michaels What a clever idea!

Maegan Tintari 26 pts

First of all "bull caca" is making me LOL!!! And to answer your question, I think they do it for money. {Hypothetically} I would only sell the dress if the marriage didn't work out...

I wore an ivory corset and jeans because we eloped in Vegas and I won't get rid of THOSE, lol.

Rita Arens 275 pts

Maegan Tintari I would love to see your wedding pics, Maegan.

Conversation from Twitter

danquahspeaks
danquahspeaks

blogher ...no because I rented mine best decision...
http://t.co/R52luVbe

Conversation from Facebook

Christina Baglivi Tinglof
Christina Baglivi Tinglof

Donated mine to charity.

Christine Chapman
Christine Chapman

Yes and Yes!

Sandy De Jesus
Sandy De Jesus

Donated mine to a shop whose sales go to a christian school system. When I explained that it was my wedding dress, they were shocked; but I explained that after divorcing ex-h I had dress cleaned and hoped that it's next owner has better luck than i did!!!! ^_~

Margaret Reilly Fegan
Margaret Reilly Fegan

I haven't sold my dress yet, but it's been on my to do list for the last 5 years...since 6 months after we were married. I dread the hassle of selling it. I LOVED my dress and I still do, but all it is doing right now is cluttering up my closet. We have two sons, so no daughters to save it for. We have the pictures and that is all I need along with my husband and family.I also have my mothers dress which is beautiful, but I was too tall and broad shouldered to wear it, so it still sits in the box. I saw another post about donating it to the Mary Madeline project and love that idea, so I will look into doing that and helping someone else out rather than selling it.

Cherry Young Rushin
Cherry Young Rushin

I plan to sell mine. If I can't I'll donate it or make a quilt out of it. I'll have the photos of me in it forever.

Maria Nicholson Smithson
Maria Nicholson Smithson

I had my dress made in China for $225 and sold it on ebay for $400. Whoo hooo