The only major end-of-year holiday (I’m including both Thanksgiving and Christmas) that I haven’t spent with at least one family member was Christmas 2004. I was at the tail end of spending a semester abroad in Amsterdam and I had a ticket to fly back to the States a few days later. I spent most of that day walking around the city, and I saw a musical performance at a beautiful church in Dam Square. It was nice, but I’d been there for five months by that time and I was ready to go home.
Some women like to take vacations alone. I’ve done this several times (the most notable solo trip being three days in London when I was doing that semester abroad, and I’ve driven by myself across the U.S. a few times), but usually I'm meeting up with someone once I arrive at my destination. Compared to women who really have traveled the world, the few trips I've taken by myself don’t seem very substantial.
There are a number of advantages to traveling by yourself. The most obvious? You’re the one making the decisions about where you want to go and what you want to see. You don’t have to worry about asking your friend or significant other if they’re interested in the same destination you want to go to, or if you want to see the same things once you get there. If you want to linger in front of a statue for 15 minutes, there’s nobody to stop you or sigh in boredom. You’re not being pulled or hurried along. (But on the down side, unless you’re the type of person who enjoys striking up conversations with random strangers, there’s a real possibility you might miss having someone to talk to.)
Even though a lot of women are taking solo trips, I would think the number of women who specifically take a vacation over Thanksgiving or Christmas would be smaller than other times during the year. Personally, even though I would take a trip by myself, I wouldn't purposefully book it to take place over the holiday season. I get along very well with my family, and most of my immediate family members live within a few hours drive. On top of that, I only get to see some of my aunts and cousins a few times a year (Thanksgiving and Christmas being included in that total). So if I were to stay away, that’s just one less time I’d get to see some people that I think are pretty cool individuals.
That being said, if a woman really wants to go somewhere and she doesn't care what time of year it is, traveling alone during the holidays (or anytime else) is perfectly acceptable and should be encouraged. The few times I’ve had a female friend tell me they were going on a solo vacation, I’ve responded, “Good for you! That’s awesome. I should really do that, too.”
I know I’ve been guilty of putting off trips because I didn’t want to go alone, while the truth is I’d probably have a grand old time if I actually went through with it. And if I decided to take that trip over a holiday, I’m sure my family would be a little disappointed but they certainly wouldn’t be upset or disown me over it. Sometimes you just have to do what’s best for you.
Have you ever taken a trip by yourself? Did it take place over a major holiday? If you haven’t done so, would you?
Related Reading:
Francisca Kellett quotes a report by Travelsupermarket that says one in nine women never take a vacation because they don’t have a man to go away with.
Christine Koehler discusses solo travel in historical terms, including how it used to be taboo for women to travel by themselves.
Natalie Walsh: Why are single women missing out on holidays? “A new survey reveals that many single women are not taking holidays because they are reluctant to travel alone.”
Judy Lees: Solo travel works best if you have a focus
MSNBC: Singles getaways: Best places to travel solo
Onely highlights a fun site for singles called SoloTravel
CSTN [Connecting: Solo Travel Network] “is a not-for-profit, international organization of individuals interested in sharing going-solo tips, news about single-friendly trips, and in promoting hospitality and good will among solo travelers everywhere.”
Thelma & Louise "is an online community of women worldwide which enables members to meet like-minded women, find travel companions and fulfil their aspirations.”
(This week, Zandria decided to renew her apartment lease for another year and finally embraced the wonders of new technology by trading in her old-school iPod. She blogs regularly at Zandria.us.)
Comments
I would...
Zandria,
I have no family to visit (which I think would be a huge determining factor), so I would travel on the holidays. Changing up my routine - and not sitting at home feeling sorry for myself- would be major reasons to do so.
The crowds of people also trying to travel at that time might be a deterrent.
The year my parents died, the spouse and I spent the holiday on an Hawaiin cruise. Just about the perfect get-away for the holiday. Would do something similar all over again.
Debra
A Stitch In Time
Weight for Deb
Not having close family that
Not having close family that you'd like to hang out with on a holiday is a huge determining family. If I didn't have any family, or wasn't close to mine, I dare say I'd look for opportunities to get away. :)
Personal blog: Zandria.us
BlogHer blog: Singles/Fitness
I love traveling alone.
I don't know if I'd take a trip by myself over Christmas or Thanksgiving - never have - but I'm not opposed to the idea.
This Thanksgiving I decided to visit my sister in California, so I'll leave for San Diego Thursday morning and with the time difference (and please, may there be no delays...) I'll be there by noon PST. I feel a little bad leaving my parents and my grandma but my sister has a nice place out there and does a full dinner so I think to go and be with her in her home is a good change. Plus, I've been feeling frustrated by lack of progress in my own personal life so shaking up the routine works for me. Sometimes, as a single woman in my late 30s, it's a drag to be stuck in old family routines. I love them very much but I'm not 15 anymore and sometimes the old shoes just don't fit. I know this is way different for many people, that's just my experience.
My birthday is Dec. 27 so there's a lot of pressure in that week - adding the "what do I do for New Year's?" quandary and I more or less want to sleep until the ball drops. Sometimes there isn't enough wine in the world....;) I regularly threaten to be on a beach for my birthday and one of these years that's going to come true.
Great links here, Zan - thanks. I'll bookmark this one.
Laurie
LaurieWrites
I think it's great that
I think it's great that you're getting away and doing something a little different this Thanksgiving (especially since you're in a bit of a transition period right now). I'm sure you'll have a great time at your sister's place. :)
Personal blog: Zandria.us
BlogHer blog: Singles/Fitness
Never did
I never traveled alone. I think most people - female or male - prefer to have company when they travel. I just asked my husband and he said that he wouldn't want to travel alone.
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Mommy Blogger Wannabe.
I manage my kids' activities at UpToUs.
It depends
on what type of person you are really. Some people like travelling sol and others don't.I usually prefer travelling with friends or family but must admit the odd occasion solo is sometimes a chance not to be missed.
Personal blog:
Paris Apartments
sure
I'm not particularly sentimental about spending the holidays with my family. Actually I prefer to travel to see them at other times of the year, when airports are less insane.
Granted, I'm unlikely to run off and leave my husband all alone for Christmas, but if I were single I could totally imagine it.
The only thing I dislike about solo travel is eating at nice restaurants alone.
-Jul
This non-American Life
I feel the same way. I'd
I feel the same way. I'd rather visit my parents during summer vacation than fight holiday travelers and winter in New England.
Whenever my husband I travel together we usually schedule a little time away from each other for our own activities. I like to be on my own, but you're right about eating in nice restaurants alone.
Stephanie SD
I write about life in Africa at Where in the World Am I? and I blog gluten-free at What I Eat
Talked to myself the whole trip!
Last year, I tagged along with my husband on a business trip to Italy. Since he was working all day, I spent my days combing through Florence, Milan, and Rome alone. Mostly I enjoyed it, although I was disturbed to discover that being alone did not stop me from sharing my observations, meaning that I spoke to myself a lot. Aloud. Fortunately, no one dragged me off to a cell with padded walls, and while it definitely is more fun to find a statue of a man picking his nose in an alley in Florence when someone is with you, I'd rather travel alone rather than not go at all.
Suzanne Reisman, Contributing Editor - Feminism & Gender
Campaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) & Other Rants
I've never...
...travelled alone, I mean, except from reach a destination by plane / train to meet people. I'd like to experience such a thing, also for the "need" to be more opened and know more people. Sometimes when you travel in group, you lose opportunity to meet new presons...
well, I will do it for sure, it will be more and more difficult travelling with friends, as working and not being studnets it's not easy to have the same holiday weeks...
Laura
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My site on apartments in Paris and more