You don't bring me flowers....anymore
One day per year. Just one day. Today is Tuesday, but really any day will do just fine.
I was at an event last week and seated at a table with four other couples. The conversation was all over the place and then one husband said, "Enough already! Let’s talk about sex"!!
Well that conversation, when married couples are involved, and my husband is present, can be a bit uncomfortable for me. I am no prude. Oh no sir. I am very comfortable speaking about most things and as you know, if you read my blog, I will write about ANYTHING!
But I felt a bit nervous because I do not know these people at all.
The conversation was familiar. The husbands focused exclusively on how little they are having sex and how hot and voracious their wives' appetites used to be and now.....not so much. Boring......
I often tell my husband that if we had as much sex as he talks about wanting...well, jobs would be quit, and kids would be horrified!
Guess what lover? I, too, miss all that hot steamy, drop your pants at the mere sight of you walking in the room, constant sex. Yes. I said it. It is true. It is not like that anymore. We are grown-ups with jobs and kids and responsibilities and aging, tired bodies, and kids who are hip to us going in the closet to "chat".
Guess what? You don't bring me flowers anymore either. You used to send me flowers. You used to come home with a bouquet that you bought at a roadside stand just because...
And I miss the hot, spur of the moment, almost constant sex... but I miss the flowers as well. The flowers and what they represented. You thinking about me. Not the naked, awesomely sexy me....the woman you love, adore and want to spend eternity with, me.
The flowers represented big red heart LOVE. The flowers always resulted in big hot steamy sex as well. Draw the line men. It is straight. Maybe it isn't flowers for you. Maybe it is wine. Or Starbucks. Whatever it is, it is part of the deal. Part of the draw.
I do not use sex as a reward. It is not a weapon either. If we had a handful of hours home alone....well quit your grinning and let's drop our linen....but at the same time, I won't take the blame for the change in the sex life. It isn't a one sided deal. We got busy. We filled our life up with this wonderful career and family and home and activities. 90% of the time it is as satisfying to me and my heart as that torrid sex we used to have all the dang time.
Not a replacement however. We had to adjust our schedule to accommodate this amazingly FULL life. I always want you. Always.
A bouquet a roses wouldn't hurt though. Steer the conversation away from sheer numbers and towards the buildup and the courting and the thoughts that you had about us and our amazing love story. I think everyone could use a bit more of that part...no?